Project “PM,” a well-funded government psy-op
INTERNET — Barrett Brown, who conspired with Hector Monsegur AKA Sabu in snitching out millions of righteous Anonymous virtual sit-in activists, revealed from prison to the despicable tabloid, Vice magazine, that his imprisonment was all an intentional publicity stunt meant to bring attention to fake government-sponsored …MOAR!
Kim Jong-Un’s real war was waged on our minds.
PYONGYANG — Thursday evening, Dear Leader Kim Jong-Un revealed to pathetic American audiences his secret life as K-pop star PSY, of “Gangnam Style” fame. The “Gangnam Style” YouTube video was viewed more than any video in the history of time, fulfilling the Kim …MOAR!
Bitcoins may soon be worth next to nothing at all.
INTERNET — New hardware designed by Butterfly Labs promises to mine bitcoins more cheaply than ever before. If you aren’t familiar with bitcoins, they are a digital currency deriving their rarity and value through advanced cryptographic algorithms. Only so many bitcoins can …MOAR!
College basketball player Kevin Ware’s leg was fractured by the Illuminati, Sunday.
LOUSIVILLE — Kevin Ware, basketball player for the Lousiville Cardinals, suffered a brutal leg injury at the hands of fiendish Illuminati players from Duke. Diving to block a shot and influenced by some kind of witchcraft, Ware landed badly and his leg …MOAR!
Police say his limousine driver was high from an immense, billowing cloud of secondhand marijuana smoke.
LAS VEGAS — Austin “Chumlee” Rustle, known widely for his employment at the famed Gold and Silver Pawn Shop featured on “History” Channel’s “Pawn Stars” Reality Television Show, was arrested Friday for possession of over seven pounds of …MOAR!
Pastor Hal W. Hubbard caresses an Eastern Diamondback rattlesnake.
Saddleback Mountain, VA — Pastor Hal W. Hubbard of the Pentecostal Church of Holiness outraged the nation Wednesday with statements denouncing traditional marriage and the sacrosanct status of fetal life. In a recent sermon, Hubbard said, “God’s children are …MOAR!
Is this man th3j35t3r? Critical Thinking and Psychology Books resoundingly say YES.
FRHIDLEY, Minnesota — A recent chatlog between patriotic hacker th3j35t3r and the lying serial pedophile accuser John Thiessen was published on Thiessen’s blog, detailing the hacker’s firm and brutal grasp on Thiessen’s cojones. After this chat, John Thiessen posted a …MOAR!
2 Chainz overdosed on crack.
ATLANTA — Rapper Tauheed Eppz, known to fans as “2 Chainz,” and “Tity Boi,” died Sunday from heart complications related to crack smoking. In his recent single, “Crack,” 2 Chainz said, “Everywhere I go I got crack, I got that crinack.”
2 Chainz came under fire from hip hop …MOAR!
RIP Bashar Al Assad, dead from an assassin’s bullet on March 24, 2013
DAMASCUS — Brutal Syrian Dictator and Opthamologist Bashar Al-Assad was assassinated by a disgruntled bodyguard Sunday Morning, as western propaganda alleged his involvement in recent chemical attacks rightfully attributed to so-called revolutionary forces which act as proxies for Christendom. Assad was …MOAR!
DALLAS — Teary-eyed and sobbing like a little girl, Glenn Beck announced that he would personally put his dog down on Sunday. “He is teaching me a very important lesson in dignity,” Beck said, as he shared his shameful emotions with the entire world. “He’s a Mason dog,” added Beck. “Victor’s lessons are …MOAR!