The newest leak on the NSA a “silver bullet” for internet manipulation.
INTERNET — Humans are entirely irrational and guided by unconscious compulsions rather than evidence, according to a new document leaked after hackers infiltrated the US Secret Psyop Command nestled within the NSA’s secrecy zone. Journalst Glenn Greenwild reported, “Now that . . .
The !Kung didn’t even farm, and why would they?
KALAHARI — The !Kung were some of the last sane people on Earth, living by foraging on a staple nut which has more calories and protein than an equal amount of any genetically modified grains. Insane people, driven by a paranoid fear for . . .
Bashir al-Assad condemned America as the great terror of the last century and demanded they dismantle their nuclear program.
DAMASCUS — After President Obama put a hold on the impending Syrian invasion, Bashir al-Assad took time to speak with reporters about his use of chemical weapons. The reformer-turned-dictator said, “Yeah, I gassed . . .
Miley Cyrus Died shortly after Gang Raping Friday Afternoon.
HOLLYWOOD — A group of young men, unable to contain their libidinous urges after repeated sexual performances by Miley Cyrus, brutally gang raped the former child star who then died tragically from internal injuries.
Miley’s recent performance at the MTV video awards featured . . .
The world’s number one terror target, the 1,776 foot tall Freedom Tower, fell after terrorists carefully laced the interior structure with nanothermite.
NEW YORK — After three consecutive weeks of the most elevated terror alert levels since 2001, synchronized attacks have nonetheless killed millions of innocent Americans on the twelfth anniversary of . . .
As pseudoevent season approaches, a new naming system for storms draws from pop culture to keep viewers interested in potential disasters. (Actual graphic from The Weather Channel)
With hurricanes building to catastrophic levels off the coast of Africa and the annual 9/11 memorial terror attacks looming, it’s officially pseudoevent season. Analysts expect . . .
A polemic cartoon contrasts the no-prisoners humor of the “Old Anonymous” with the humorless “New Anonymous.”
Pranks that required hundreds or even thousands of participants found a regular home at the anonymous humor forum 4chan, where the mythical Anonymous wrote the pranks as much as the pranksters wrote the myths. An all-powerful . . .
Assange received news of his failure in the Australian election and called on Anonymous to destroy his enemies.
INTERNET — Julian Assange’s highly publicized bid for the Australian senate has failed after his controversial Libertarian-allied Wikileaks party received just over half a percent of votes. Other fringe parties which received even less . . .
A new tumor eating fad has swept through Southeast Asia, attracting many adventurous tourists to “Cancer Delis”
BANGOLA — “Cancer Delis” are making waves across Southeast Asia, as jet-set tourists seek increasingly bizarre and rare foods. Many different types of tumors are served at these delis with malignant pig brain tumors fetching . . .
The NSA is using ‘cyborg’ Squirrels to eavesdrop on the Iranian nuclear weapons program.
INTERNET — Iranian sources report that small chips implanted in squirrel populations have been found containing data on sensitive nuclear weapons projects. These advanced chips are powered by kinetic energy from the scurrying of the animal. . . .