In Daring Election Day Pitch, Anonymous Presidential Endorsee Warren Grady Promotes TEAHAD Re-education Camps

JACKSONVILLE, FLA. – Speaking from the deck of his personal boat, Tea Party Candidate for President Grady Warren, who received an early 2011 endorsement from The Internet Chronicle , outlined a daring plan to fight big government. Through the instatement of “re-education camps” targeted at at-risk members of the youth population too ne’er-do-well to serve as janitors in their high schools, Mr. Warren’s plan will see a brighter future.

“That future is out there,” said Mr. Warren. “It is waiting for us. Our children deserve it. Our nation depends on it. The peace and freedom of the world require it. And with your help we will deliver it. Let us begin that future for America tonight.”

The National Education Association, he explained on his fishing vessel, “Little Skippy,” is in fact a money-laundering criminal organization, a tyrannical behemoth serving as the iron fist of the virtually omnipotent teachers’ lobby. Over the course of President Obama’s first term public school teachers have seen their collective bargaining rights enhanced and expanded, and their nominal salaries rise to levels unseen since the close of World War II. U.S. schools currently pay teachers exorbitantly, with compensation and pensions far higher than in any other industrialized nation.

Speaking in a comfortable pair of shoes from a Madison, Wisconsin picket line February 17, 2011 President Obama expounded upon his own proto-fascist ideology: “The United States is the greatest nation on earth. Therefore as long as I am its president its teachers will receive no salary, no wage lower than any other nation’s.”

Mr. Warren’s visionary plan, endorsed by North Carolina State Professor Kamau Kambon and Democratic Strategist Melissa Harris-Perry, would pulverize the NEA’s unholy jackboot at the tarsals. The five-point Warren plan for Small-Government Education Success is simple:

1. Re-open military bases and allow any serviceman or servicewoman forced away post-BRAC to return to the more convenient location.
2. Utilize 2010 census data to locate households containing (or likely to shield) impoverished teenage or young adult black males.
3. Conduct a poll of the Tea Party Caucus mailing list of Representative Michele Bachmann (R-MN) on the nature of what constitutes an “American man” and have the Defense Department develop a curriculum based on these scientific findings.
4. Use the new, improved National Defense Authorization Act’s powers to detain all targets.
5. Transfer all targets to the re-education centers, each target’s designated center decided by lottery.

Mr. Warren’s five-point plan, which Redditors have likened to the plot of “Bioshock Infinite,” undermined Mitt Romney’s southern strategy throughout the summer. Mississippi Republican voters, for instance, of whom a plurality are opposed to the legality of interracial marriage, were seduced by the Tea Party candidate’s smoother hair and moral fortitude. “We were worried when we heard Mr. Romney was wearing that blackface on Univision,” said Gloria Porter, 29, of Jackson. Her husband, Bobby Porter, his crossed arms moving abruptly between her and this reporter, said he was concerned that Mr. Romney was encouraging “race-mixing.”

As a consequence of the poll damage Anonymous candidate Grady Warren was doing in the South, Mr. Romney released four attack ads that targeted Mr. Warren’s plan to entice legally present ethnic minorities into sanctuary cities. Bill Murphy, social media director for the Romney campaign who has previously warned Americans about the oncoming black-on-white race war, told The Washington Times September 22 that Mr. Warren’s plan to actually offer cash assistance to “incent the lowest rungs of the 47 percent rabble” was barely an improvement on President Obama’s own wealth redistribution schemes. Added Mr. Murphy, “Americans aren’t fooled by the Warren bait-and-switch of offering security while encumbering job creators with these cash allowances, which are extracted through force. Why should Americans have to pay the race pimps and class warriors to go away?”

In April 2011 Grady Warren received The Internet Chronicle’s endorsement after he made clear that America’s wealthiest are not only powerfully independent and self-sustaining but also victims of everyone else.

President Barack Hussein Obama II, whom the ivory tower elites have designated to glide to victory on the backs of the Houston chapter of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, may be able to rig enough electronic voting machines in Ohio, Colorado, Florida, Virginia and Pennsylvania. But Real America will know that Mitt Romney was the real winner.

Larry Sabato, director of the University of Virginia Center for Politics, said Monday it is possible that Republican Presidential Nominee Mitt Romney may very well win the popular vote, as Al Gore did in 2000, while ultimately losing the electoral vote. “Abercrombie & Fitch clothiers throughout the greater Los Angeles metropolitan area,” he said, “are bracing for hordes of Caucasian looters and rioters.” Korean American proprietors  of free-standing Disney Stores are taking special precautions, knowing that European Americans may prove not only zealous, but also sufficiently well-armed, to attempt to make off with golden era anti-Semitic merchandise from the “Disney Vault.”

Paul Ryan washes dishes at Ohio soup kitchen and hurries out

Paul Ryan meets free black man

Paul Ryan seen addressing a free black man.

After an embarrassingly forced visit to a soup kitchen, Paul Ryan failed to accrue more votes for himself and aspiring war criminal Mitt Romney.

On his way out, Ryan encountered a free black man. Ryan then demanded the Uncle Tom’s name, but refused to stop and talk with him.

Bill Murray is also known for “crashing parties” by showing up to wash random homeowners’ dishes, but Paul Ryan has found that a demeaning tone, paired with not actually washing any dishes, goes over just as well as he doesn’t care that day about anything going on around him.

“I’m Paul Ryan. Glad to meet you.”

“Glad to meet you too.”

Born and raised here, are you really? Cool. I’m from a town, similar, called Weansley.

Similar to what?

Ryan walks away while the man was still talking to him.

No trespassing.

The Evil Hierarchy of Reddit Moderators

Reddit Moderator

Increasingly, all people are being turned into objects. This is more than a gender issue. This is the death of the Subject. Nobody has truly come to grips with the horrible alienation of Social Media. On r/creepshots, people have entered a sick feedback loop that we all know ends with ragdoll porn and sex doll necrorape fantasy. Sure it’s legal, but so is investigating the identities of the people who moderate it.

“What kind of person would want to sit around and moderate Reddit all day?” ~ Viciously Raped Sex Doll

Adrian Chen is a dickhead who constantly steals his ideas from Chronicle.SU, and Gawker is a piece-of-shit tabloid, but Violentacrez, a person who didn’t even take elementary precautions to protect his identity, cannot be doxed. Just because he’s your friend and he’s being attacked by a tabloid doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice the freedom of speech.

In this day and age it’s so common for meaning to be inverted by a small group of people who control media. Just look at the way Christians claim that abortion is an affront to religious freedom. Censoring Gawker in the name of freedom of speech is the same thing. Your bff, Violentacrez, might have been unfairly treated by someone trolling for tabloid hits, but is the answer really abusing your power to censor an entire media outlet? Why’d you even bother with the SOPA blackout?

I’ve had my run-ins with Reddit Moderators in the past. In fact, Chronicle.SU is banned from r/politics. By banning Gawker, a small group of people have ONCE AGAIN proven they are merciless tyrants.

 

Brown Taken Down

BARRETT BROWN, ANONYMOUS GATEKEEPER

Barrett Frowns

Self-appointed, self-medicating “leader of Anonymous” Barrett Brown was heard struggling against intruders Wednesday, hump day, September 12. Sources confirmed Thursday morning Brown is sitting in a Dallas jail.

Brown’s credibility came under scrutiny after Kilgore Trout tricked Brown into believing he was actually talking to Amber Lyon, a dipshit CNN correspondent. Brown subsequently accused Trout via Twitter of having sex with his girlfriend marking a gradual, but distinct dissolution of sanity and reason which ultimately led Brown to make threats against FBI agents, presumably prompting the raid.

Wednesday’s raid signifies the last nail in the crystal coffin of Brown’s otherwise transient career. Brown was recently heard ranting against all things in a telephone call with Topiary, the actual leader of anonymous. Brown has also appeared in videos making delusional claims provoked by unseen sources of paranoia.

Barrett Brown is the glorified blogger who once belonged to the underground hacker group Anonymous and, for a while, got to decide who gets to join anonymous and who does not. Chronicle.su, he said, is not anonymous, like himself, Barrett Brown – or similarly, Sabu.

Brown, below, threatens the FBI with an ultimatum


Brown describes the purpose of Project PM to be “wiping out this fucking government” and “certain media publications” (chronicle.su maybe? We definitely know he means the NY Times)

Sources discuss chronicle.su and make threats against her glorious staff of anti-leaders

DonaldRumsfeld is legit

RI State Rep. Dan Gordon (R) promotes cyberattack on “Supreme Court”

Tweetspeak Translation: The Supreme Court of the United States has been knocked offline by Anonymous because of its decision on the Affordable Care Act, and Representative Dan Gordon has a raging hard-on because of it.

Thursday, the Supreme Court ruled that most provisions of the Affordable Care Act were constitutional, as the controversial “individual mandate” fell under the power of Congress to levy a tax. Apopleptic critics such as State Representative Dan Gordon got on Twitter to vent their frustrations and put their big stinkin’ feet right into their big stinkin’ mouths.

However, that cliched metaphor doesn’t quite capture The Dan Gordon’s fecal mouthful. As a State Representative, no one really cares, and he has gotten away with worse multiple times. Known for Stolen Valor, Homophobia, Drunk Driving, Assault and Battery, and his affiliation with Anonymous, The Rep Dan is now known for his stark gullibility and abject failure at understanding the most basic workings of the Internet.

In the heat of The Dan Gordon’s rage over the Supreme Court decision, @YourAnonInc, a terribly obvious parody account openly controlled by Chronicle.SU, tweeted the following: “@RepDanGordon http://supremecourt.us  ‪#TangoDown‬ Join ‪#OpLiberty‬ Please RT ‪#Anonymous‬.” Dan’s response was a hasty retweet followed by an independent endorsement of the ongoing “operation.” There’s a lot of jargon here that might not make sense to those who aren’t involved in Twitter or Anonymous culture, so I’ll spell it out, especially for the Rhode Island State legislators who must be sick of this stain on their honor.

“Tango Down” is an expression popularized by “th3j35t3r,” which refers to a Distributed Denial of Service attack (DDoS), in which a web site is maliciously overloaded with traffic until it can no longer provide service. There were no DDoS attacks in response to the Supreme Court’s ruling, and http://supremecourt.us is a nonexistent web site. It is not even under the official .gov domain extension, another simple point that would have tipped off anyone with the least bit of web savvy. The hashtag #OpLiberty refers to the nonexistent group of people carrying out these nonexistent attacks on the nonexistent web site, which also serves as a hyperlink to their ongoing discussion. Had Gordon, or anyone, clicked that hyperlink, he would have instantly found that no such discussion exists.

Gordon’s incapacity to verify facts and simply use the Internet is frankly hilarious, but that’s a fairly common thing for legislators. It’s just not fair to expect people of his age to display a competent level of Internet savvy. While he does posture himself as a member of Anonymous, most have long known this to be a total front. What’s shocking is his ringing personal endorsement of what he thought was a cyberattack on the Supreme Court, the body directly responsible for ultimate interpretation of the laws he’s supposed to be legislating. It may have all been a pathetically simple ruse, but his intentions couldn’t have been more clear. Representative Dan Gordon has zero respect for the highest Judicial body in this country. Furthermore, he’d go so far as participating in attacks on their web site which, by their very nature, rely on promotion via social media.

Is Gregory D. Evans th3j35t3r?

Is this the face of th3j35t3r?

Patriot hacktivist th3j35t3r is known for attacking WikiLeaks, Westboro Baptist Church, Anonymous, and the Internet Chronicle. In a recent blogpost by Reaper Security, which is incredibly well-cited, th3j35t3r’s methods are laid bare. As it appears, th3j35t3r’s biggest victories have all been either totally faked, the work of others, or ridiculous exaggerations. Reaper Security once allied themselves with th3j35t3r but have since stated, “Stop taking credit for things you didn’t do, start giving credit where credit is due, and we’ll shut up. I still consider you a friend, though if you wish to label me as an enemy as you did on your blog, then so be it.”

Th3j35t3r has built up a strong reputation for charlatanry, and his career bears a striking resemblance to Gregory D. Evans of Ligatt security. Attrition.org has compiled an extensive list of Gregory D. Evans’ alleged misdeeds. These include spamming campaigns, check fraud, the purchase of fake Twitter followers, cyber bullying, and most damning, extensive plagiarism. Simply put, Gregory D. Evans’ behavior is entirely consistent with th3j35t3r’s. This connection comes on the heels of a recent campaign naming Tom Ryan of Provide Security as th3j35t3r. An Anonymous security expert commented, “If Evans can get Ryan smeared as the Jester, that’s one less competitor for him.”

Marvin Heemeyer, Black Bloc Martyr

Hero for "The People" (notice, he is wearing black)

Marvin Heemeyer was an average citizen of Granby, Colorado, a very small town run by city officials who were out to get anyone they didn’t like. These power-hungry maniacs attacked anyone who wanted freedom, even using the local media to spread lies.

The city council rejected plans to hook Heemeyer’s shop up to sewer lines and fined him tens of thousands out of spite. He sought permission to build a new route to his muffler shop, even purchased a bulldozer to do this, and the city council rejected this plan, putting him out of business. Not one to be kept down, Heemeyer read a lot of Black Bloc propaganda and decided to take the path of non-violent coercion and self defense.

Heemeyer sold his shop and set to work planning for his one-man Black Bloc protest. Using extreme determination and grit, Heemeyer created the greatest defensive weapon a protester could hope for: A Komatsu D355A bulldozer with full plate steel reinforced concrete armor. By creating his own autonomous zone, where no fascistic riot police could repress his right to peaceful protest, Heemeyer was prepared to become Black Bloc’s most historic martyr.

Heemeyer painted his armored bulldozer black to signify his willingness to participate in property destruction as a form of protest.

Heemeyer took his heavily-modified protest Komatsu D355A and completely destroyed buildings which housed members of Granby’s anti-muffler-shop-industrial-complex. His first target, of course, was his own muffler shop, the heart of the conspiracy. After that, he hit the city hall, the local newspaper, the mayor’s house, and everyone who had been an enemy to liberty. However, Heemeyer remained totally non-violent through this entire encounter, firing only warning shots at police who came too close.

Of course, Heemeyer was totally suicidal. As soon as the armor was dropped onto the bulldozer, there was no way out except death. But did he have a choice, in the face of endless tyranny? Of course he did, but he used the horizontal organization model, so it was ethically right. Also, he didn’t actually kill anyone, so his non-violent diversity of tactics is to be applauded.

Let’s remember that Black Bloc is a tactic, and not a group, as that is an extremely important point in substantive discussion of this topic. A single person can create a fully autonomous zone and pull off perhaps the most effective Black Bloc protest of all time. Over $7 million in damages, you wanna talk about smashing the state?! WOW! There is no doubt, Marvin Heemeyer is Black Bloc’s greatest martyr.

Possible Breitbart Coroner Murder Like When Katrina vanden Heuvel and Jane Hamsher Argued about Vince Foster and the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict

LOS ANGELES – The fear generated by the death of a man Internet spectators thought could have been the coroner for recently deceased right-wing pundit Andrew Breitbart is evocative of when Firedoglake Publisher Jane Hamsher and The Nation Publisher Katrina famously argued about their respective coverages of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and the death of Vince Foster.

One day in August of 2010, Nation Fellow Philip Weiss wrote an article accusing Firedoglake of ignoring issues of Palestine, claiming that Firedoglake was too bent to the will of Israeli ultra-nationalists.

Ms. Hamsher would respond, “FDL is 1 of the ONLY left blogs w/someone writing abt Palestine (Siun) & you’d have 2 be a f&^%king r#%ard not to Google that.” Added Ms. Hamsher, “So @KatrinaNation is paying Vince Foster conspiracy peddler @MondoWeiss to attack “professional left” now. @NationInstitute must be proud.”

Ms. Hamsher’s “professional left” comment was an allusion to a comment by then White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs derogating President Obama’s ideological critics in the press.

Philip Weiss is, at least as of April of last year was still writing for The Nation. He described his own frustration with journalistic colleagues who rejected him for failing to accept his conclusions, or lack thereof, regarding the death of Foster.

I wasn’t trusted to write about politics around that time. ‘You’re over-determined,’ one writer said with condescension. I thought I was just a reporter. And Joe Klein had said as much novelistically, in Primary Colors.

So I was grateful to Bill Clinton when he capped his Administration with an act of corruption, absolving Marc Rich, for all to see.

I was hugely grateful to both Clintons when they turned her campaign into an Ahabish pursuit of power, a race-a-thon, an impeachment-grudgematch, a mad grind for Bill’s redemption, and showed that they would do anything. Again: for all to see.

And I am now personally grateful to Hillary for exposing the violence and thuggery that exists at the cold black bottom of her politics, for all to see. Her wish-fulfillment statement about assassination reminds me of the night I got back from my first trip to Little Rock in 1996.

Hillary Clinton with Vince Foster

Hamsher would charge that keeping Weiss as a Nation fellow — in effect paying him to write –amounted to “intellectually lazy limousine liberal effete wankery.”  She would compare Mr. Weiss to extremist or at least disingenuous commenters at Firedoglake.

“Hey @KatrinaNation,” wrote Ms. Hamsher, “we banned some 9/11 trolls from our comments last week. You can have em 4 Nation Institute Fellows if u want.”

The comments section at the LA Times after the death of a supposed Breitbart coroner  evokes that 2010 discourse about The Nation’s coverage of the Foster death and Firedoglake’s Southwest Asian news coverage.

Russell Taylor wrote: “The quickest way to commit suicide? Know some dirt on the government, and even think about putting it out to the public.”

Another party compared the coroner’s death to that of deposed Libyan leader Muammar Gadhafi: “I’ve been wondering as an aside what Khaddafi had on the US Government that led to him being double crossed the way he was, and WHY he did not plan for such an event by entrusting information with a secret 3rd party as ‘life insurance’

Mr. Taylor elaborated on his beliefs: “Ever notice that people investigating possible political crimes, either come up with no results from those investigation, or they quit breathing before announcing results.”

But it was by April 20th that the Los Angeles coroner’s office had already issued a report — a report, if not a final report — announcing that the conservative blogger had died of hardened arteries.

Also at the LA times, user “Obama EATS DOGS” wrote:

Obama Death Toll (so far)….. 3 gay choir members at Trinity Church in Chicago, where Obama attended Rev Wright’s sermons for twenty years. Plus one Kam Kuwata (Democrat Strategist and Dianne Feinstein best friend) who went missing and was found 2 weeks later, dead inside his Venice Beach home. Plus Andrew Breitbart who died “of natural causes” in LA. And NOW, the LA Coroner who (possibly) helped investigate Breitbart’s death gets poisoned to death with arsenic, the same week the Breitbart autopsy report is due for release!

Here at the Ulsterman Report is more on the theory that Kam Kuwata was assassinated.

Despite the fact that Vince Foster died in 1993, Eva Harper wrote:  “Don’t forget Vince Foster, friend to the Clintons who was killed during the 2008 campaign cycle…”

Mark Flaming, on Facebook, a self-described “Hebrew Slave at Offshore Oil/Natural Gas” found incredible claims that the coroner had died while amidst recreation. “Due to a hobby’?” he wrote. “What was his hobby? Eating poison? I think he knew more than the current administration thought was good for him (or them),” adding, “I wonder who’s going to fall over dead next? Probably whoever investigates his murder! Arsenic anyone?”

A 28th of April Facebook posting suggested Mr. Fleming may have possessed a deeper, abiding instinct regarding those of greater melanin content. Commenting on an Alabama killing alleged to be a race-based retaliation for the killing of Trayvon Martin, Mr. Fleming wrote on Facebook, “Blacks are the biggest and worst racists I know.”

Ray N Felitto III wrote:

The Trinity United choir leader was a man named Donald Young who happened to be and was also known in the Chicago ghettos and dem circles as Obama’s pre presidential gay lover or at least one of many. Even Young’s mother has confirmed all this as truth, but the media is of course AWOL even this time around. Just like they will be here. Also No coincidence. http://bit.ly/ctzVit

With respect to the dead choir members, “Ray N Felitto III” is referencing reporting done by the Globe, on display at rense.com; as well as the Wayne Madsen Report.

 

MLA Rules: Academic TYRANNY

So I’ve been looking at academic papers lately and I don’t know what the fuck is going on with citation rules. Has academia gone mad? The RULES have this bizarre inertia that has only RESISTED technology with MORE FUCKING RULES rather than used technology to apply OCCAM’S FUCKING RAZOR.

The MLA, or the FUCKING MODERN LANGUAGE ASSOCIATION has BLOCKED the MOST FUCKING IMPORTANT development in MODERN LANGUAGE for DECADES!!!! I’d tell you it’s all an insane conspiracy, ORWELLIAN to the farthest EXTREME, but it’s got to be complacency or something. Someone out there HAS to have seen this. It couldn’t be more OBVIOUS.

Actual text using the crazy new form of citation known as HTML, or HYPERTEXT:

When writing an MLA formatted document, an academic must create a list of sources, contextualize recommendations of other sources with footnotes, and use numeric reference to their own list of sources. This worked perfectly back in the archaic days of paper, but nowadays it seems like the inertia of power has persisted in bizarre ways that only hampers the quick access of information. There is an entirely new realm of discourse known as hypertext, definitively better than traditional text. According to the MLA rules, italics are only to be used for extreme emphasis and certain titles. Never all-caps. Never HYPERTEXT. Son, those ain’t no complete sentence. F [Imagine this like the last sentence is the teacher writing in bloody red ink after CROSSING OUT your whole fucking sentence like it doesn't mean SHIT AND FAILING YOU for not following some arbitrary insane rules cooked up by an evil Orwellian-named conspiracy. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME!]

Remember, folks, it makes your paper SO MUCH MORE RELIABLE when you use DIFFERENT SOURCES that all tell you the same thing about a nearly static set of pointless authoritarian rules. Just hover over the links there for a second, if you’re still not sure this can work. YOU’LL SEE THE MLA DOCUMENTATION POP UP LIKE FUCKING MAGIC! You’ll see THE FOOTNOTES!!! My god, I wonder how many 60 year old folks on the MLA board of rulemakers have no idea that this kind of thing EVEN EXISTED UNTIL JUST NOW!

“Oh, those off-color underlined things, so fucking ugly. What the fuck is that? Not part of MY modern language! No SIR!” ~MLA Autocrat Olds Oldington V

This is probably the reason why most academics despise Wikipedia. Wikipedia has told the MLA to take their rules and fuck ‘em! Hypertext will slash your “Modern Language” rules down to a simple set of guidelines that ANY IDIOT can figure out. BUT WE DON’T WANT THEM GETTING TOO SMART, DO WE?

Hypertext is a SIMPLE thing to learn. It’s certainly simpler than the MLA rules. Oh yeah, did I mention it gets rid of all that BILE in brackets AND at the bottom of the page?

FUCK OFF MLA!!!!!

*I know we still need you, partially, for the remainder of time before all written text ever is digitized and freely available in a global public library FOR THE PEOPLE!

May Jesus forgive us of our sins, so that we may spend more of our time with substantive learning, rather than obsessing over antiquated and confusing systems of contextualization.

Amen.