Brown Taken Down

BARRETT BROWN, ANONYMOUS GATEKEEPER

Barrett Frowns

Self-appointed, self-medicating “leader of Anonymous” Barrett Brown was heard struggling against intruders Wednesday, hump day, September 12. Sources confirmed Thursday morning Brown is sitting in a Dallas jail.

Brown’s credibility came under scrutiny after Kilgore Trout tricked Brown into believing he was actually talking to Amber Lyon, a dipshit CNN correspondent. Brown subsequently accused Trout via Twitter of having sex with his girlfriend marking a gradual, but distinct dissolution of sanity and reason which ultimately led Brown to make threats against FBI agents, presumably prompting the raid.

Wednesday’s raid signifies the last nail in the crystal coffin of Brown’s otherwise transient career. Brown was recently heard ranting against all things in a telephone call with Topiary, the actual leader of anonymous. Brown has also appeared in videos making delusional claims provoked by unseen sources of paranoia.

Barrett Brown is the glorified blogger who once belonged to the underground hacker group Anonymous and, for a while, got to decide who gets to join anonymous and who does not. Chronicle.su, he said, is not anonymous, like himself, Barrett Brown – or similarly, Sabu.

Brown, below, threatens the FBI with an ultimatum


Brown describes the purpose of Project PM to be “wiping out this fucking government” and “certain media publications” (chronicle.su maybe? We definitely know he means the NY Times)

Sources discuss chronicle.su and make threats against her glorious staff of anti-leaders

DonaldRumsfeld is legit

Frank Mason to leave chronicle.su forever

Why? Why is chronicle.su this hateful black enterprise I can not even stand to look at anymore?
Why do I no longer like this place?

Seriously, I’m about to pull a Geo because there are just too many bad vibes around this hate hole. I’m sending up a distress flare because I don’t know what else to do anymore. I’m no longer funny, this website isn’t funny, we are just hurtful abusive people with no respect for dead children or their grieving families.

I used to think chronicle.su was a bottomless source of ironic lies but now I’m not so confident in that assertion. Sure, there are 35 people staring at DEAD LIL WAYNE at any given moment, but it’s not like they can read anyway or else they would already know he is “alive,” whatever you take that to mean . . . But I’m not talking about just trying to make the a sound for apple and pronouncing cat, but really reading – and comprehending – the world around them.

Literate individuals don’t fall for LIL WAYNE DEAD and park on the webpage all day, and spread it around without checking other sources. Okay, dying AIDS-infected Africans were crossing the Sahara to register their grievances at the metropolis internet cafe. So what chronicle.su has proven to me in the last nine months is worse than anything I could have ever imagined without performing this experiment for myself:

1. There are more stupid people than statistics could possibly account for, and yet I’m astounded by the numbers.

Akon DEAD Lil Wayne DEAD Lady GaGa BRAIN CANCER ALL DEAD

It took “readers” an average of almost three minutes to determine how their favorite rapper actually died of AIDS before anyone knew he contracted it.

2. I am a toxin. If there’s anybody I can think of besides our last fourteen presidents who deserves brain cancer, it’s Lady GaGa for making anti-intellectualism appear sexy and appealing, and yet I am the one who made people cry announcing she has brain cancer.

But since I did it anyway, check out this video of the some little girl freaking out about it or something. Or don’t. Just go the fuck away now.

Lady Gaga! She wants to be like you when she grows up. A vapid, expressionless sellout! GOOD WORK, WHORE.

Nothing is funny anymore. Nothing is surprising. Anonymous is dead, and even that is kind of sad because it was so funny to watch internet losers migrate the handle from DDoSing Hal Turner, to blocking up a fake swimming pool in Habbo Hotel, to Scientology, and all the way back around again to DDoSing bank websites before finally getting arrested en masse. Yummy yummy honeypotty! Now we’re wasted, now we’re screwed. Now I’m bored. So what the fuck is next?

ANSWER: I don’t give a shit. I am going to lay it all right out for you. I know by now we have some fans (people who hate us are “fans,” too, by the way) and for some reason you keep coming back here to see if I replied to your meaningless comments, to see if your shitty, grammatical atrocities are making a difference on my own fake opinion (they don’t), because you might feel that you’ve somehow caused a tree to fall in the forest – and for everybody who heard it, no one paid attention. Not even me. Especially not me. And I am writing now to inform you– no, to ask of you– no . . . I am just writing. And that’s how it’s going to be. That’s what I’m laying down.

I’m a cunt sliver . . .

Frank Mason

If you ever once came to this website and thought I was writing to you, for you, about you – even if I was – I don’t want your feedback. I’m a cunt sliver away from turning off all the comments, globally, and firing material into your blank eyes with NO POSSIBLE RECOURSE. ZERO. Because I’m tired of you. I’m tired of the pressure. I’m tired of this broken, hateful website, and I’m tired, most of all, of hating this place I (ironically) designed to be hated.

I’m DONE with it. I’m done with you festering, stinking maggots who sallow each article. I’m done with your cute usernames, multiple IP addresses, multiple fucking usernames, and every combination inbetween. I’m done with your tired little surmises. I’m done with your discussions. I’m done with the chat room, the radio show, and most importantly – in case I haven’t yet made it clear – I’m done with you.

FUCK THE READERSHIP. ALL OF YOU. MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS, MY LANDLORD – ESPECIALLY MY LANDLORD, HE IS A THIEVING CHARLATAN like the readers. I DON’T GIVE A FLYING HAT TRICK WHO YOU ARE. I AM FINISHED WITH ALL OF IT, AND THIS WEBSITE.

Stay tuned for my absence.

Frank Mason is gone.

Funeral for the myth

Excerpt from Georges Sorel’s Wikipedia:

Sorel’s was a voluntarist Marxism: he rejected those Marxists who believed in inevitable and evolutionary change, emphasizing instead the importance of will and preferring direct action. These approaches included general strikes, boycotts, and constant disruption of capitalism with the goal being to achieve worker control over the means of production. Sorel’s belief in the need for a deliberately-conceived “myth” to sway crowds into concerted action was put into practice by mass fascist movements in the 1920s. The epistemic status of the idea of “myth” is of some importance, and is essentially that of a working hypothesis, with one fundamental peculiarity: it is an hypothesis which we do not judge by its closeness to a “Truth”, but by the practical consequences which stem from it. Thus, whether a political myth is of some importance or not must be decided, in Sorel’s view, on the basis of its capacity to mobilize human beings into political action; the only possible way for men to ascend to an ethical life filled by the character of the sublime and to achieve deliverance. Sorel believed the “energizing myth” of the general strike would serve to enforce solidarity, class consciousness and revolutionary élan amongst the working-class. The “myth” that the fascists would appeal to, however, was that of the race, nation, or people, as represented by the state.

Clearly, Occupy and Anonymous have enacted a myth in which a powerless government works under the yoke of a global corporate conspiracy to suppress 99% of the population while 1% lives in opulence. The not-so powerless “police state” is tracking all Internet communications globally and has virtual omnipresence, omniscience, and omnipotence. The core of this myth is that Democracy is dead, otherwise there would be no need for direct action. Chomsky, a stolid supporter, often describes this myth as “imagery.” It doesn’t do to tell a believer that, no, there is actually a much more complicated set of circumstances behind the perceived decay of American culture and economy, and the death of Democracy is only a part of a myth meant to bring about a global revolution.

Before going further, it’s helpful to take a look at another end of the “myth spectrum,” where America is the final bastion of freedom under constant threat of attack from government over-regulation, Mexican immigration, and Islamic terror. Quite obviously, this is much closer to the kind of myth fascists like Mussolini and Hitler employed. On the surface, this myth portrays a valorous Democracy standing in defiance to the forces of evil and terror, yet the siren call of its greatest adherents is really a funeral dirge for a Democracy that is already dead and must be revived through the act of voting.

This is not the world of Sorel or Mussolini, and there is not the same kind of disenfranchised laborers facing down despicable conditions imposed upon them by corporate overlords. Discontent, as expressed by Occupy and Anonymous, flows much more from a generalized feeling of dissatisfaction with simulacra than it does from actual economic repression. This manifests itself through wide-ranging general complaints against everything from environmental degradation to military imperialism, but it really flows from the culture’s inability to deal with media which presents increasingly falsified versions of reality.

The failure of Occupy to actualize the mythical revolution might be answered by Sorel with an adapted myth. Taking the successful twist employed by the right which promotes voting, even in the face of a “dead” Democracy, however, might require abandonment of the idea of revolution. Ideas, however, are plastic. Portraying voting as a truly revolutionary act, within the confines of the two-party system, is somewhat problematic, but not impossible to overcome. These confines, in any adapted myth, should be obliterated by new technology. The power of Social Media to draw huge amounts of publicity to those with no real financial backing is intensely important, potentially lending power to those who are not a part of either party.

But still, that is all a ridiculous dance in the world of fairy tales and simulacra. What is really needed is fundamental education about the myth itself. This is not just education, but meta-education. Not simply a prophylactic against misinformation and disinformation, as these are truly all that exists, but rather a collective self-awareness. It is not enough to know the way a politician will spin a yarn, or the way media will frame in bias. By self-awareness, I mean complete understanding that these are things we do ourselves, personally, every time we speak. To put the tendency for myth making on the “other” is yet another myth prone to all the grave consequences of violent Fascism. In short, Sorel’s view of the myth as the only way to inflict “ethical life” on the other is itself a myth.

RI State Rep. Dan Gordon (R) promotes cyberattack on “Supreme Court”

Tweetspeak Translation: The Supreme Court of the United States has been knocked offline by Anonymous because of its decision on the Affordable Care Act, and Representative Dan Gordon has a raging hard-on because of it.

Thursday, the Supreme Court ruled that most provisions of the Affordable Care Act were constitutional, as the controversial “individual mandate” fell under the power of Congress to levy a tax. Apopleptic critics such as State Representative Dan Gordon got on Twitter to vent their frustrations and put their big stinkin’ feet right into their big stinkin’ mouths.

However, that cliched metaphor doesn’t quite capture The Dan Gordon’s fecal mouthful. As a State Representative, no one really cares, and he has gotten away with worse multiple times. Known for Stolen Valor, Homophobia, Drunk Driving, Assault and Battery, and his affiliation with Anonymous, The Rep Dan is now known for his stark gullibility and abject failure at understanding the most basic workings of the Internet.

In the heat of The Dan Gordon’s rage over the Supreme Court decision, @YourAnonInc, a terribly obvious parody account openly controlled by Chronicle.SU, tweeted the following: “@RepDanGordon http://supremecourt.us  ‪#TangoDown‬ Join ‪#OpLiberty‬ Please RT ‪#Anonymous‬.” Dan’s response was a hasty retweet followed by an independent endorsement of the ongoing “operation.” There’s a lot of jargon here that might not make sense to those who aren’t involved in Twitter or Anonymous culture, so I’ll spell it out, especially for the Rhode Island State legislators who must be sick of this stain on their honor.

“Tango Down” is an expression popularized by “th3j35t3r,” which refers to a Distributed Denial of Service attack (DDoS), in which a web site is maliciously overloaded with traffic until it can no longer provide service. There were no DDoS attacks in response to the Supreme Court’s ruling, and http://supremecourt.us is a nonexistent web site. It is not even under the official .gov domain extension, another simple point that would have tipped off anyone with the least bit of web savvy. The hashtag #OpLiberty refers to the nonexistent group of people carrying out these nonexistent attacks on the nonexistent web site, which also serves as a hyperlink to their ongoing discussion. Had Gordon, or anyone, clicked that hyperlink, he would have instantly found that no such discussion exists.

Gordon’s incapacity to verify facts and simply use the Internet is frankly hilarious, but that’s a fairly common thing for legislators. It’s just not fair to expect people of his age to display a competent level of Internet savvy. While he does posture himself as a member of Anonymous, most have long known this to be a total front. What’s shocking is his ringing personal endorsement of what he thought was a cyberattack on the Supreme Court, the body directly responsible for ultimate interpretation of the laws he’s supposed to be legislating. It may have all been a pathetically simple ruse, but his intentions couldn’t have been more clear. Representative Dan Gordon has zero respect for the highest Judicial body in this country. Furthermore, he’d go so far as participating in attacks on their web site which, by their very nature, rely on promotion via social media.

Is Gregory D. Evans th3j35t3r?

Is this the face of th3j35t3r?

Patriot hacktivist th3j35t3r is known for attacking WikiLeaks, Westboro Baptist Church, Anonymous, and the Internet Chronicle. In a recent blogpost by Reaper Security, which is incredibly well-cited, th3j35t3r’s methods are laid bare. As it appears, th3j35t3r’s biggest victories have all been either totally faked, the work of others, or ridiculous exaggerations. Reaper Security once allied themselves with th3j35t3r but have since stated, “Stop taking credit for things you didn’t do, start giving credit where credit is due, and we’ll shut up. I still consider you a friend, though if you wish to label me as an enemy as you did on your blog, then so be it.”

Th3j35t3r has built up a strong reputation for charlatanry, and his career bears a striking resemblance to Gregory D. Evans of Ligatt security. Attrition.org has compiled an extensive list of Gregory D. Evans’ alleged misdeeds. These include spamming campaigns, check fraud, the purchase of fake Twitter followers, cyber bullying, and most damning, extensive plagiarism. Simply put, Gregory D. Evans’ behavior is entirely consistent with th3j35t3r’s. This connection comes on the heels of a recent campaign naming Tom Ryan of Provide Security as th3j35t3r. An Anonymous security expert commented, “If Evans can get Ryan smeared as the Jester, that’s one less competitor for him.”

Marvin Heemeyer, Black Bloc Martyr

Hero for "The People" (notice, he is wearing black)

Marvin Heemeyer was an average citizen of Granby, Colorado, a very small town run by city officials who were out to get anyone they didn’t like. These power-hungry maniacs attacked anyone who wanted freedom, even using the local media to spread lies.

The city council rejected plans to hook Heemeyer’s shop up to sewer lines and fined him tens of thousands out of spite. He sought permission to build a new route to his muffler shop, even purchased a bulldozer to do this, and the city council rejected this plan, putting him out of business. Not one to be kept down, Heemeyer read a lot of Black Bloc propaganda and decided to take the path of non-violent coercion and self defense.

Heemeyer sold his shop and set to work planning for his one-man Black Bloc protest. Using extreme determination and grit, Heemeyer created the greatest defensive weapon a protester could hope for: A Komatsu D355A bulldozer with full plate steel reinforced concrete armor. By creating his own autonomous zone, where no fascistic riot police could repress his right to peaceful protest, Heemeyer was prepared to become Black Bloc’s most historic martyr.

Heemeyer painted his armored bulldozer black to signify his willingness to participate in property destruction as a form of protest.

Heemeyer took his heavily-modified protest Komatsu D355A and completely destroyed buildings which housed members of Granby’s anti-muffler-shop-industrial-complex. His first target, of course, was his own muffler shop, the heart of the conspiracy. After that, he hit the city hall, the local newspaper, the mayor’s house, and everyone who had been an enemy to liberty. However, Heemeyer remained totally non-violent through this entire encounter, firing only warning shots at police who came too close.

Of course, Heemeyer was totally suicidal. As soon as the armor was dropped onto the bulldozer, there was no way out except death. But did he have a choice, in the face of endless tyranny? Of course he did, but he used the horizontal organization model, so it was ethically right. Also, he didn’t actually kill anyone, so his non-violent diversity of tactics is to be applauded.

Let’s remember that Black Bloc is a tactic, and not a group, as that is an extremely important point in substantive discussion of this topic. A single person can create a fully autonomous zone and pull off perhaps the most effective Black Bloc protest of all time. Over $7 million in damages, you wanna talk about smashing the state?! WOW! There is no doubt, Marvin Heemeyer is Black Bloc’s greatest martyr.

Possible Breitbart Coroner Murder Like When Katrina vanden Heuvel and Jane Hamsher Argued about Vince Foster and the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict

LOS ANGELES – The fear generated by the death of a man Internet spectators thought could have been the coroner for recently deceased right-wing pundit Andrew Breitbart is evocative of when Firedoglake Publisher Jane Hamsher and The Nation Publisher Katrina famously argued about their respective coverages of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and the death of Vince Foster.

One day in August of 2010, Nation Fellow Philip Weiss wrote an article accusing Firedoglake of ignoring issues of Palestine, claiming that Firedoglake was too bent to the will of Israeli ultra-nationalists.

Ms. Hamsher would respond, “FDL is 1 of the ONLY left blogs w/someone writing abt Palestine (Siun) & you’d have 2 be a f&^%king r#%ard not to Google that.” Added Ms. Hamsher, “So @KatrinaNation is paying Vince Foster conspiracy peddler @MondoWeiss to attack “professional left” now. @NationInstitute must be proud.”

Ms. Hamsher’s “professional left” comment was an allusion to a comment by then White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs derogating President Obama’s ideological critics in the press.

Philip Weiss is, at least as of April of last year was still writing for The Nation. He described his own frustration with journalistic colleagues who rejected him for failing to accept his conclusions, or lack thereof, regarding the death of Foster.

I wasn’t trusted to write about politics around that time. ‘You’re over-determined,’ one writer said with condescension. I thought I was just a reporter. And Joe Klein had said as much novelistically, in Primary Colors.

So I was grateful to Bill Clinton when he capped his Administration with an act of corruption, absolving Marc Rich, for all to see.

I was hugely grateful to both Clintons when they turned her campaign into an Ahabish pursuit of power, a race-a-thon, an impeachment-grudgematch, a mad grind for Bill’s redemption, and showed that they would do anything. Again: for all to see.

And I am now personally grateful to Hillary for exposing the violence and thuggery that exists at the cold black bottom of her politics, for all to see. Her wish-fulfillment statement about assassination reminds me of the night I got back from my first trip to Little Rock in 1996.

Hillary Clinton with Vince Foster

Hamsher would charge that keeping Weiss as a Nation fellow — in effect paying him to write –amounted to “intellectually lazy limousine liberal effete wankery.”  She would compare Mr. Weiss to extremist or at least disingenuous commenters at Firedoglake.

“Hey @KatrinaNation,” wrote Ms. Hamsher, “we banned some 9/11 trolls from our comments last week. You can have em 4 Nation Institute Fellows if u want.”

The comments section at the LA Times after the death of a supposed Breitbart coroner  evokes that 2010 discourse about The Nation’s coverage of the Foster death and Firedoglake’s Southwest Asian news coverage.

Russell Taylor wrote: “The quickest way to commit suicide? Know some dirt on the government, and even think about putting it out to the public.”

Another party compared the coroner’s death to that of deposed Libyan leader Muammar Gadhafi: “I’ve been wondering as an aside what Khaddafi had on the US Government that led to him being double crossed the way he was, and WHY he did not plan for such an event by entrusting information with a secret 3rd party as ‘life insurance’

Mr. Taylor elaborated on his beliefs: “Ever notice that people investigating possible political crimes, either come up with no results from those investigation, or they quit breathing before announcing results.”

But it was by April 20th that the Los Angeles coroner’s office had already issued a report — a report, if not a final report — announcing that the conservative blogger had died of hardened arteries.

Also at the LA times, user “Obama EATS DOGS” wrote:

Obama Death Toll (so far)….. 3 gay choir members at Trinity Church in Chicago, where Obama attended Rev Wright’s sermons for twenty years. Plus one Kam Kuwata (Democrat Strategist and Dianne Feinstein best friend) who went missing and was found 2 weeks later, dead inside his Venice Beach home. Plus Andrew Breitbart who died “of natural causes” in LA. And NOW, the LA Coroner who (possibly) helped investigate Breitbart’s death gets poisoned to death with arsenic, the same week the Breitbart autopsy report is due for release!

Here at the Ulsterman Report is more on the theory that Kam Kuwata was assassinated.

Despite the fact that Vince Foster died in 1993, Eva Harper wrote:  “Don’t forget Vince Foster, friend to the Clintons who was killed during the 2008 campaign cycle…”

Mark Flaming, on Facebook, a self-described “Hebrew Slave at Offshore Oil/Natural Gas” found incredible claims that the coroner had died while amidst recreation. “Due to a hobby’?” he wrote. “What was his hobby? Eating poison? I think he knew more than the current administration thought was good for him (or them),” adding, “I wonder who’s going to fall over dead next? Probably whoever investigates his murder! Arsenic anyone?”

A 28th of April Facebook posting suggested Mr. Fleming may have possessed a deeper, abiding instinct regarding those of greater melanin content. Commenting on an Alabama killing alleged to be a race-based retaliation for the killing of Trayvon Martin, Mr. Fleming wrote on Facebook, “Blacks are the biggest and worst racists I know.”

Ray N Felitto III wrote:

The Trinity United choir leader was a man named Donald Young who happened to be and was also known in the Chicago ghettos and dem circles as Obama’s pre presidential gay lover or at least one of many. Even Young’s mother has confirmed all this as truth, but the media is of course AWOL even this time around. Just like they will be here. Also No coincidence. http://bit.ly/ctzVit

With respect to the dead choir members, “Ray N Felitto III” is referencing reporting done by the Globe, on display at rense.com; as well as the Wayne Madsen Report.

 

Am I a troll?

It was December 2010, and my plans were anything but simple: Grab the world by the horns, pull up my bootstraps, and make some kind of artistic statement that just might possibly quell my existential butthurt. That is, until Anonymous once again reared its head. I became obsessed! Here was some kind of mysterious cyberentity speaking truth to power, and that’s exactly the kind of thing I love.

In early January, I logged into AnonOps with the intention of confronting Anonymous about their use of imagery. For a group of “activists,” I felt it was a little bit on the threatening side and pointlessly destructive to their cause. As an artist, I wanted to help! However, I quickly found out this topic was taboo, and that discussion among this “collective” was strictly controlled, if not by a single individual, then by a loose-knit group of channel operators. Speaking about the wrong thing will get a person labeled a troll right quick, and trolls get banned.

Well, to hell with IRC.  There were other places I could take this discussion, such as AnonNews and later Twitter. I could make it outrageous, viral, and rub their face in their own shit while they cried “I don’t smell a thing!” Hell, I had my own sad little satire blog to soapbox from, so why not use it? I embraced my role as a “troll,” and in many ways it was empowering. But I was not just playing a game of revenge, pissing off Anonymous in reprisal for their rejection. I was provoking discussion. Anons often said that infighting made them strong, but they still hated me and considered me a “shit-stirrer” and a “troll.” Like I cared.

I spent a truly TransHuman amount of time on the computer at this point, completely isolated myself from “reality,” and ultimately paid a horrible price. It cost me sanity, the trust of my friends, and my job. I picked up the pieces and put them back together, and I at least feel like a more mature person for it.

My “trolling” has earned a hesitant acceptance from many Anons, and maybe some of them finally “get it.” Maybe my history of writing viral “joke” press releases which accidentally turned out to be gems of “truth,” has even earned some respect. I’m not in this to “win” or “get one over” on anybody, except of course for Sabu and Barrett Brown. I want to sacrifice all the sacred cows and brazenly violate taboo. Ask the forbidden questions, generate discussion, and of course snag a lucrative book deal where I will tell all. This does not mean that I am just engaged in bullshit will to power. Do these interactions—deliberate provocation and ironic anti-propagandizing—make me a troll?

MLA Rules: Academic TYRANNY

So I’ve been looking at academic papers lately and I don’t know what the fuck is going on with citation rules. Has academia gone mad? The RULES have this bizarre inertia that has only RESISTED technology with MORE FUCKING RULES rather than used technology to apply OCCAM’S FUCKING RAZOR.

The MLA, or the FUCKING MODERN LANGUAGE ASSOCIATION has BLOCKED the MOST FUCKING IMPORTANT development in MODERN LANGUAGE for DECADES!!!! I’d tell you it’s all an insane conspiracy, ORWELLIAN to the farthest EXTREME, but it’s got to be complacency or something. Someone out there HAS to have seen this. It couldn’t be more OBVIOUS.

Actual text using the crazy new form of citation known as HTML, or HYPERTEXT:

When writing an MLA formatted document, an academic must create a list of sources, contextualize recommendations of other sources with footnotes, and use numeric reference to their own list of sources. This worked perfectly back in the archaic days of paper, but nowadays it seems like the inertia of power has persisted in bizarre ways that only hampers the quick access of information. There is an entirely new realm of discourse known as hypertext, definitively better than traditional text. According to the MLA rules, italics are only to be used for extreme emphasis and certain titles. Never all-caps. Never HYPERTEXT. Son, those ain’t no complete sentence. F [Imagine this like the last sentence is the teacher writing in bloody red ink after CROSSING OUT your whole fucking sentence like it doesn't mean SHIT AND FAILING YOU for not following some arbitrary insane rules cooked up by an evil Orwellian-named conspiracy. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME!]

Remember, folks, it makes your paper SO MUCH MORE RELIABLE when you use DIFFERENT SOURCES that all tell you the same thing about a nearly static set of pointless authoritarian rules. Just hover over the links there for a second, if you’re still not sure this can work. YOU’LL SEE THE MLA DOCUMENTATION POP UP LIKE FUCKING MAGIC! You’ll see THE FOOTNOTES!!! My god, I wonder how many 60 year old folks on the MLA board of rulemakers have no idea that this kind of thing EVEN EXISTED UNTIL JUST NOW!

“Oh, those off-color underlined things, so fucking ugly. What the fuck is that? Not part of MY modern language! No SIR!” ~MLA Autocrat Olds Oldington V

This is probably the reason why most academics despise Wikipedia. Wikipedia has told the MLA to take their rules and fuck ‘em! Hypertext will slash your “Modern Language” rules down to a simple set of guidelines that ANY IDIOT can figure out. BUT WE DON’T WANT THEM GETTING TOO SMART, DO WE?

Hypertext is a SIMPLE thing to learn. It’s certainly simpler than the MLA rules. Oh yeah, did I mention it gets rid of all that BILE in brackets AND at the bottom of the page?

FUCK OFF MLA!!!!!

*I know we still need you, partially, for the remainder of time before all written text ever is digitized and freely available in a global public library FOR THE PEOPLE!

May Jesus forgive us of our sins, so that we may spend more of our time with substantive learning, rather than obsessing over antiquated and confusing systems of contextualization.

Amen.