100 Molested Children Bring Class Action Lawsuit Against Hatesec Enterprises

Supple milky skin ‘No Excuse,’ say parents

At least 100 children were allegedly harmed at an event outsourced to employees of Hatesec Enterprise. Hatesec Enterprise is an Internet startup company sponsored by celebrity entrepreneur Dr. Angstrom H. Troubadauer and Lebal Drocer, Inc. The company’s mission statement states its primary goal is to bring jobs to marginalized white American citizens amid a nationwide influx of Hispanic, Latino and Middle Eastern wage earners.

Lebal Drocer Inc Touched All Dem Children

Documents suggest a controversial Lebal Drocer subsidiary designed to fuck kids may be responsible for at least 100 fucked kids.

The children harmed by Hatesec Enterprise are shielded by various child protection laws from revealing their identities, however they may soon reach an agreement preventing them from discussing the matter any further with anyone except for their team of pro-Bono attorneys donated by the kind hearted Lebal Drocer Association For The Advancement Of Fucked Kids.

Anonymous sources inside the company have revealed the scandal might have erupted from the so-called Sex Abuse “Hot”Line, a controversial wing of the startup company designed to put America’s worst sex offenders to work – a feat key social rehabilitation specialists said was impossible before now.

“We really should have seen this coming,” said Internet Chronicle Special Victims and National Security Staff Reporter Dan K. Story. “Their mission statement was to rape people professionally, and people are mad about this? I say everybody needs to calm down and let the free market work out a real solution.”

Story went on to explain the complex relationship between the Federal Government and free market economics: “If the government cracks down on this now, then we’re all going to be headed down a slippery slope of Big Government ruling every facet of our lives. See? This is why we need a domestic drone program.”

Past settlements have stated no children can speak publicly about Lebal Drocer, Inc. or its subsidiaries without express, written permission signed by company President and CEO Raleigh Theodore Sakers. Such is sexpected to be the case as their hearing goes before the courts Monday.

This message brought to you graciously by Lebal Drocer, Inc.

No children were directly harmed during the production of this news story.

Edward Snowden: Solar-Flare ‘Killshot’ Cataclysm Imminent

Edward Snowden, NSA Whistleblower, speaking from Sheremetyevo Airport’s Hotel Novotel, revealed the CIA's Project Stargate was a complete success. (Photo: The Internet Chronicle)

Edward Snowden, NSA Whistleblower, speaking from Sheremetyevo Airport’s Hotel Novotel, revealed the CIA’s Project Stargate was a complete success. (Photo: The Internet Chronicle)

MOSCOW, Russia – Edward Snowden, hacker-fugitive and former National Security Agency (NSA) contractor, revealed Tuesday that a series of solar flares is set to occur in October, killing hundreds of millions of people. Documents provided by Snowden prove that, as of 14 years ago, Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) remote viewers knew that the event was inevitable. Ever since, the world’s governments have quietly been trying to prepare for the sweeping global famine to result.

Speaking from his room at Sheremetyevo Airport’s Hotel Novotel, Snowden revealed that government preparations for October’s catastrophic solar flares have been “to only limited avail.” The flares’ results, he said, are known casually throughout the global intelligence community as “the killshot.”

Remote viewers employed by the CIA’s Project Stargate use their ability to perceive geographically and chronologically distant events to protect America. Since 1999 they have known about the solar-flare event but have been threatened into silence by enforcers on the secret government’s payroll.

As a part of hiring Snowden as a contractor, the NSA granted the 30-year-old access to all communications on earth. Now he has provided The Internet Chronicle with top-secret Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) documents outlining just how terrible the solar flares’ results will be. In just three months, “the killshot” is set to disable all electronic food and water delivery systems.

Ever since the late 20th century, hundreds of millions of people have begun to rely on technological automation to enable their very lives. Solar flares release electromagnetic pulses, hazardous to electronic circuits. The smallest electronic circuits, such as those in computers’ central processing units, will be the most vulnerable.

Snowden said FEMA and the National Disaster Reduction Center of China have been taking steps for 14 years in light of the findings of Project Stargate. FEMA’s own documents, provided by Snowden, lay out how the organization plans to round up tens of millions of the poorest Americans for housing at secure locations “to better facilitate feeding and provision of consumer goods.”

Snowden, for years a CIA contractor, released testimonials from hundreds of remote viewers. Many of those remote viewers are still on the payroll of the governments of the United States and the Russian Federation. Those testimonials, though written independently by the analysts, are comprised of 4,472 pages, every single one of which, alarmingly, evince Snowden’s account.

“The massive electromagnetic pulse from the solar flares, or ‘the killshot,’ will shutter most of the world’s electrical systems,” said Snowden. “The Americans whose lives are most at risk are the elderly and the infirmed, those who depend on technology to enable their receiving home care or life-sustaining medical treatment.”

Throughout the 1970s and the 1990s, Russia and the United States were desperate to track and monitor the construction and maintenance of each other’s nuclear silos. The nations’ governments openly admitted having poured billions of dollars into the training of elite teams of remote viewers. With their powers, the remote viewers were able to deter nuclear launches and, ultimately, bring an end to the Cold War.  In the mid-’90s, the CIA simply pretended to close its remote-viewing program, so that it could operate more effectively.

Snowden said he hopes that his coming forward will allow Project Stargate’s participants to be able to live normal, open lives again, “instead of as circus animals, instead of as freaks.” He added, “[Significant others of Project Stargate employees] have to get Q clearances just to cohabitate with, without even marrying, their loved ones. That’s tantamount to slavery.”

Humanity is about to pay a most dire price for its technological dependence. That price, said Snowden, proved a leading factor in his decision to come forward to the press – about both the global Holocaust to ensue, as well as NSA analysts’ power, on the slightest whim, to listen to the phone calls of any person on earth.

Snowden said, with regard to CIA remote viewers, “I have seen too many brave whistleblowers become subjects of smear and ridicule for using their talents to expose the truth.” Added Snowden, bitterly, “Well, we’ll see who’s Mr. Chuckles when ‘the killshot’ goes down.”

WikiLeaks attorneys; and Anatoly Kucherena, Snowden’s own counsel, together produced a video calling for calm and global preparedness. Monday, Snowden sent the video, below, to the Russian Federal Migration Service as part of his call for asylum.

Snowden Reveals Second Shooter in Zimmerman Case

NSA Slide showing irrefutable proof that there was a second shooter in the Trayvon Martin shooting.

NSA Slide showing irrefutable proof that there was a second shooter in the Trayvon Martin shooting.

SANFORD, Fla. – In possibly one of the most riveting and important events of our lifetime, a man known as George Zimmerman is caught in the middle of a racial divide that once never existed in our great country. Zimmerman is charged with committing second-degree murder and manslaughter, and as the jury is in deliberation, Snowden drops the bomb on what actually happened to young Trayvon Martin that one terrible night.

Snowden, a devout conservative and Ron Paul supporter, took to his Moscow Airport podium earlier today to give the world a treat. The treat of truth and justice. Snowden explained – using a series of PowerPoint slides – that there was, in fact, a second shooter that took Trayvon to his grave.

Trayvon, according to Snowden, was actually a part of the Cyber Command/Lockheed Martin censorship regime violating Americans’ constitutional rights, covering up cell tower electromagnetic weapon assaults on citizens. He goes further to even call Trayvon a “lame psy-op, perpetrating the worst social manipulation and mind-control games in the history of the United States.”

It is Snowden’s belief that Trayvon was put down for trying to “get out of the game.” From what we can see from one of Snowden’s slides, he offers irrefutable proof that George Zimmerman is completely innocent on all counts.

This bombshell of a leak comes at a very critical time in the Zimmerman trial, as now the jury must find Zimmerman not guilty.

NSA Whistleblower Ed Snowden: Saddam Hussein did WTC 7

Ed Snowden revealed former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein perpetrated the attack on World Trade Center 7. (File Photo)

Ed Snowden revealed former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein perpetrated the attack on World Trade Center 7. (File Photo)

MOSCOW, Russia – Edward Snowden has revealed Iraqi President Saddam Hussein gave the order for the controlled demolition of World Trade Center 7 on September 11, 2001. Able to access the electronic communications of anyone, the elite hacker-fugitive is changing the very shape of history by leaking 9/11 truth.

For years before 9/11, Hussein had been plotting an attack on the World Trade Center site. According to documents released Saturday by Snowden, Hussein was unaware that the al-Qaeda terrorist organization had been plotting a parallel, and much more ambitious, attack of its own. On the morning of 9/11, once he noticed the success of bin Laden’s attack, Hussein quickly gave the go-ahead for his own military strike, even though it was originally planned for a date weeks later.

Snowden shared internal emails between the Central Intelligence Agency and the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST). The emails discuss how the Iraqi Republican Guard broke into WTC 7 in August 2001. Then the elite Iraqi unit, who swore allegiance directly to the Iraqi dictator, proceeded to plant hundreds of pounds of conventional explosives, in addition to a highly reactive compound called “nano-thermite,” on the building’s superstructure.

Hundreds of pages of correspondence by senior Bush administration officials, which Snowden has provided, indicate that NIST was little more than the government’s propaganda arm. Former Vice President Cheney ordered NIST to cover up the truth about 9/11, he wrote in December 2001, “even if it means making it look like we did it.”

NIST and the CIA appear to have had knowledge of Hussein’s hand from as early as November 2001.

“Orders came down to NIST to put a clamp-down on their discovery of Iraq-linked nano-thermite in the molten-hot debris,” said Snowden. He added, “It’s basically the same thing they do all the time to the global warming studies on behalf of the oil companies.”

While most  Americans understand the terrorists who guided the ill-fated planes that day to have been Saudi Arabian, Egyptian, Lebanese and Emiratee, Snowden’s revelation that the Iraq War was not waged simply to seize Iraqis’ oil is likely to surprise many.

“It wasn’t just about the genocidal machinations of Christian crusader Zionists,” said Snowden in his suite at Sheremetyevo Airport’s Hotel Novotel. “In order to help the [Federal Bureau of Investigation] save some face, [former National Security Adviser Condoleezza] Rice and Cheney decided  that a slip-up of that magnitude would lead to the firing of too many political appointees. So they squelched the story. Their cronies in the criminal mainstream media played along, or” – Snowden made a “double tap” gesture of firing a gun into the brain and the heart.

Those assassinations, he said, happened “whenever somebody got ‘too close to the sun,’ as White House officials called it in code. Often that necessitated their taking drastic steps – the persecutions of [9/11 scholar] Chris Bollyn and [9/11 journalist] Amy Goodman, the assassinations of [9/11 scholar] Phillip Marshall and [9/11 whistleblower] Barry Jennings, you name it.”

Angstrom Troubador, associate professor at Columbia University’s School of International and Public Affairs, expressed shock and dismay at Snowden’s having definitively revealed the truth about 9/11. Said Troubador by phone, “There’s a saying in the Beltway: ‘You’re nobody in this town if you haven’t apologized for supporting the Iraq War.’ But knowing that Saddam Hussein did WTC 7 will lead to some major shake-ups and axeings at [the Council on Foreign Relations] and the rest of the think-tank crowd.”

“To think,” added Troubador, “that the conventional wisdom – that Bush’s answers about Hussein’s role in 9/11 were cryptic or criminally deceitful – is now torn asunder. The reality is Bush was like a vigilant, better-knowing father.”

Confidentiality agreements with Snowden stipulate that much of the fugitive’s documentation of the Hussein-World Trade Center 7 connection cannot be released until after he receives successful asylum.

Snowden reveals HAARP’s Global Assassination Agenda

Snowden speaking from a Custom Faraday Cage in Sheremetyevo Airport's Hotel Novotel (Photo: The Internet Chronicle)

Snowden speaking from a Custom Faraday Cage in Sheremetyevo Airport’s Hotel Novotel (Photo: The Internet Chronicle)

MOSCOW, Russia – Edward Snowden, NSA whistleblower and fugitive, released documents Tuesday to Internet Chronicle reporters proving that the High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program, or HAARP, is definitively engaged in a program of assassination and mind control.

EMERGENCY UPDATE: Snowden has revealed an oncoming global cataclysm.

While the military prison industrial complex has routinely insisted that the Alaska-based HAARP is only meant to study natural phenomena in earth’s ionosphere, Snowden has managed to blow open a brutally massive charade.

“The HAARP research station,” he said, “strategically based away from prying eyes near Gakona, Alaska, is actually used to terminate or manipulate would-be dissidents of global capitalism on the scale of millions of people.”

Added Snowden, using finger quotes, “With these terrestrial antennas, NATO [the North Atlantic Treaty Organization] is able to, on a global scale, remotely silence ‘perpetrators’ of ‘deviant or subversive’ strains of thought.”

Unbeknownst to victims or their loved ones, HAARP projects ultra-high-powered radio waves. Those waves operate at the same electronic frequency as the truncus encephali, or brain stem, selectively inducing deaths seemingly by natural causes  – including by some appearing to coroners as innocuous as strokes or heart attacks.

“When and if the intelligence community doesn’t view outright assassination as an optimal effect,” said Snowden, “‘they’ can simply make a ‘target’ act in an insane fashion, in order to discredit them. When we were in transit between Hong Kong and Moscow, WikiLeaks staff and I had to fend off the constant threat of radio-generated homicidal delusions.”

Quickly ushering staff into his lavish room at Sheremetyevo Airport’s Hotel Novotel, the former NSA contractor began to explain himself. Due to confidentiality agreements with the 30-year-old, formerly of Booz Allen Hamilton, the Chronicle cannot elaborate beyond the point that he has outfitted his entire flat to be a thoroughly functioning Faraday cage.

Snowden’s haphazardly constructed Faraday cage, he claims, can block interference from external static and nonstatic electric fields.

“Without it,” he says, “I would have been dead the moment The Guardian‘s first story went to print.”

Snowden bolstered his testimony with HAARP documents gleaned from the private email accounts of officials as high-ranking as admirals and Air Force brigadier generals. Sources within the intelligence community have confirmed to The Internet Chronicle the authenticity of these documents, as well as their horrifying ramifications for human dignity.

Sources familiar with discussions between the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) and the University of Alaska, which helps run HAARP, suggested that cell towers, as well as TrapWire, are “in play here.”

Snowden’s testimony appears to be partially in line with that of a U.S. senator’s brother, in 2009. It was then that he, Nick Begich, told “Conspiracy Theory with Jesse Ventura” that “just to affect the brain with emotional state changes is so easily accomplished” with HAARP.

Watch this excerpt from that program:

Snowden reveals UFO documents after receiving asylum in Venezuela

According to bombshell documents leaked by Snowden, the government has long known UFOs to be a species more advanced than mankind.

According to bombshell documents leaked by Snowden, the government has long known UFOs to be a species more advanced than mankind.

CARACAS — Edward Snowden, the leaker of NSA surveillance documents, was granted asylum in Venezuela on Friday. With safe harbors in sight, Snowden was willing to share shocking and world-shattering exclusive secret government documents with the Internet Chronicle. Snowden’s testimony was as follows:

“The highest levels of government don’t know what to do about UFOs, and the official story that they are all merely weather balloons or natural phenomena have been clearly dismissed. If anything, these documents speak about UFOs as if they are surely guided by an intelligence beyond our own. As it turns out, the most credible and inexplicable sightings are of vehicles which have been spotted leaving the sea floor at hydrothermal vents and directly entering solar orbit. Because ballistic missile tracking systems and deep sea sonar are kept as state secrets, scientists don’t have access to data about these objects. However, most of the contractors at DARPA are sure that there is a species more intelligent than homo sapiens living in the mantle of the Earth . . . It makes sense, if you think about it, because that is the only place where conditions have been more or less stable for billions of years. Extremophiles may live at different temperatures than us, but they have been able to thrive and develop intelligence at a seemingly accelerated rate. That’s not true, because they’ve simply evolved at the same rate, but without many of the vicissitudes which set back surface life . . . The president receives daily briefings about their activities, but analysts believe their technology is so far advanced that we stand little chance of survival in any potential war. The general sentiment is that we are but ants from their perspective, so there is little chance they would empathize or attempt to communicate with us, and the current contingency plan is to detonate nuclear weapons in deep caverns to ‘sting’ the foe we have no hope of destroying in hopes it would discourage further attacks.”

Snowden unveils NSA Satellite SAURON Program targeting Citizens

Edward Snowden unveiled SAURON, a network of satellites capable of spying on the entire planet's surface and indefinitely retaining the images.

Edward Snowden unveiled SAURON, a network of satellites capable of spying on the entire planet’s surface and indefinitely retaining the images.

MOSCOW, Russia – Edward Snowden, the whistleblower who recently unveiled the NSA’s ubiquitous PRISM wiretapping program, unveiled yet another insidious, citizen-targeting surveillance system Friday afternoon, in a chat with Internet Chronicle reporters.

SAURON, or the Semi-Autonomous Ultra-high-Resolution Orbital Network, is comprised of a series of hundreds of low-orbiting cameras that can make out objects on the ground as small as 1 centimeter in size.

There are so many satellites in this network that they are able to effectively monitor the entire planet’s populated surface without interruption. According to slides Snowden shared, taken from the NSA presentation on SAURON, each spy satellite feeds directly into a data bank so large that it is able to retain the captured imagery indefinitely.

SAURON is also a reference to a villain in J.R.R. Tolkien’s “Lord of the Rings” trilogy, an evil god of discord who appears in the material world as an ever-searching eye.

Snowden, looking as if he hadn’t slept in weeks, spoke with Internet Chronicle reporters in the transit corridor of Moscow’s Sheremetyevo airport. In a near whisper Snowden said, “It is shocking that the U.S. government would appropriate such evil imagery for a so-called security system like this. There is little doubt that this program – I won’t utter the name here – is not concerned with the security of citizens, but rather, it is a bald grab at power for power’s sake.”

Supermarkets collect metadata with discount cards, says Snowden

Snowden has proved the insidious discount card programs at Supermarkets track your every move.

Snowden has proved the insidious discount card programs at Supermarkets track your every move.

MOSCOW, Russia – New leaks by Edward Snowden, the whistleblower responsible for unveiling NSA surveillance programs, show that all “discount cards” offered by supermarkets are in fact used as part of a ubiquitous data collection and surveillance program.

“Every time you swipe that card to save a few measly cents,” said Snowden, via collect call, “they collect information on everything you purchase. They know what you eat and drink, and they know how you pay for it.”

Supermarkets fired back at Snowden, claiming that the data isn’t identified with individuals unless it poses a clear and present danger.

But Snowden provided evidence to The Internet Chronicle showing that that was clearly not the case. In documents obtained during his tenure as elite hacker for the NSA, Snowden uncovered a program to profile every individual, including images taken from supermarket video surveillance, which has been in place for decades.

“They watch you pick up every item and can compare it with metadata,” warned Snowden. “Everyone has a file, and I wouldn’t be surprised if shoplifters were prosecuted 10, 20 years down the line when it’s possible to analyze this data in more detail.”

North Korea grants asylum for Snowden

Hackers around the world have been searching for a home for their wayward comrade, Edward Snowden. Finally, it seems, they have settled on North Korea.

Hackers around the world have been searching for a home for their wayward comrade, Edward Snowden. Finally, it seems, they have settled on North Korea.

SEOUL, Republic of Korea – In response to a formal application for asylum on behalf of Edward Snowden, Kim Jong-un issued a statement offering the whistleblower not just asylum, but full North Korean citizenship. Snowden and his entourage, staffed mostly by WikiLeaks employees, were ecstatic at the news of a safe haven after 14 other countries had denied their applications.

“The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea promises to allow Edward Snowden to continue to leak anything he wants. We will provide him with many of the best top-secret hacking tools available in North Korea,” said a representative from the North Korean military.

“We are just so relieved that Snowden has finally found friendly shores,” said Glen Greenwild, the reporter who famously interviewed Edward Snowden in a Hong Kong hotel.

Snowden issued a statement written in Spanish, thanking North Korea for their commitment to freedom.

Senator Wendy Davis dead at age 50

Emotional moments before Senator Davis’ untimely demise.

WASHINGTON, DC — Fans mourn the loss of Texas senator Wendy Davis as the news reels trickled in this morning. After amassing support from not only Texas democrats throughout her years as a politician, she managed to garner a hefty klout score last night as her awe inspiring anti-abortion bill filibuster ran for 11 hours straight.

While the Texas senator was in good shape, dawning pink Nike crossfit training shoes to keep her buoyant on her final dance floor, she could not outrun the angry mob of rubes awaiting her outside the senate floor who tweeted furiously #StandWithWendy, collapsing Davis under the weight of her own eFame.

“She was a total fighter,” said Cecile Richards, president of Planned Parenthood Action Fund and champion kick-boxer. “She’ll be missed around the gym, that much is certain.”