Curiosity Rover finds Fossil evidence of life on Mars

Here on Earth, the hole in the ozone layer is “bleaching” coral reefs, killing them in a process that turns them white.

HOUSTON, TEXAS – Tuesday, scientists at NASA were shocked by images of a Cnidarian fossil beamed from Mars. The Curiosity rover, which has been surveying an ancient riverbed, unearthed a bright white fossil which NASA’s exobiologists say appears similar to primordial coral reefs.

Coral reefs are formed by colonies of simple polymorphous invertebrates which lack organs. Angstrom H. Troubadour, spokesperson for the exobiology lab at Curiosity command, said, “This object could be anything from a piece of an ancient Martian coral reef to a previously undiscovered form of life.”

Other experts are critical of this announcement, calling it “premature,” but Mr. Troubadour maintains that this is sure evidence of life on Mars, adding “The object may not even be fossilized. If that’s true, it’s an incredible find because it would contain much more organic material to analyze. It may even give us a profound insight into why life on Mars died out.”

This image, taken by the microscope on Curiosity, appears to be final proof of life on Mars.

Science has long held the probability of of extraterrestrial life to be incredibly high. This probability is so high, in fact, that this discovery does not come as any surprise to the community. Some churches, however, have already denied that this discovery could be possible. Pastor Fred Falwell of Liberty Baptist Church says, “Satan has placed this fossil, like other fossils on Earth, in order to deceive mankind and deny the truth of the Bible. There is nothing in Genesis about God creating life on Mars, so it is surely a deception of Lucifer.”

Despite some skepticism, this discovery has fired the imaginations of people worldwide, and some have even taken to the streets rejoicing in the fact that we are not alone. Environmentalists have taken this as an opportunity to preach about the frailty of life, and UFO enthusiasts have also hailed this discovery as evidence for their long-held beliefs.

The microscopic apparatus of Curiosity examines the Coral’s skeleton in detail.

66 comments to Curiosity Rover finds Fossil evidence of life on Mars

  • Ralphie "Gee Whiz" Riccio

    Don’t compare Symond to the man who put that thar fossil there.

  • Fleur de Lis

    Pastor Fred Falwell clearly has the mind of a child and the people that pay allegiance to him are rejects from another century. Where do all these backwards weirdos hail from? Enlighten me so I never have the misfortune of traveling into such hillbilly territory. Man, those people just suck.

    • Punky Wooster

      Pastor Fawad and Symond are Gods. You clearly have not heard the SHARP gospel, written by them and sung by me. Keep on Dancing for the Lord! YAY!

  • Reality Check

    Jeez people, why do you have to throw the god’s into everything? This isn’t the Middle Ages, get a grasp on reality already. You country folk are operating on the wavelengths of a ten year old. Facts & science will always triumph over fairy tales, even over the Greatest “Story” Ever Told.

    • Ralph Wiggins

      You haven’t heard the greatest story ever told, as perpetuated by Lord Symond, and The Gee, ya see. Poppers, latex, and 20 eyes will light the way. This is the candy skin doctrine, learn it and live it!

  • “You and I existed long before the sun. And you and I will exist long after it.” -Yeehaw

  • Ralph Wiggins

    Hail Bill Riccio!