Porn Legend Ron Jeremy Dead at 59

jeremy Porn Legend Ron Jeremy Dead at 59

Ron Jeremy was revered for his generosity.

LOS ANGELES — Fans mourn the loss of porn star Ron Jeremy, whose remarkable cock exploded tragically during the opportunistic shooting of an unauthorized “onsite” pornographic film at Cedars-Sinai hospital. Jeremy was hospitalized after suffering a near-fatal heart aneurysm.

Mike Sesterman, Ron Jeremy’s agent, said Wednesday Jeremy died as he lived: “Jeremy died while performing multiple simultaneous sex acts on a swathe of gorgeous, beautiful women for a mockumentary in his hospital bed. He loved all the support of his friends and fans and swore he would forever fuck life in the ass, until the day that he died.”

Jeremy’s cock partially exploded while buried in the rectum of a young Hollywood nurse, who asked not to be named for fear of losing her job at Cedars-Sinai. Blood squirted from the tip of his penis as it split like a flower down the middle.

Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador, urologist, stated, “I have never seen such a large cock in my entire life. Porn Stars like Ron often abuse cock-enhancing medication which can lead to heart aneurysms and sudden cock explosion. Common sources of these drugs are internet e-mail spammers, who often cut their products with dangerous stimulants to provide short-term penis length gains.”

Mike Sesterman is responsible for dispersion of the Jeremy estate. The estate, he said, is to be divided among Jeremy’s family and cock-growth medication hucksters to whom he owes various debts and apologies.

24 comments to Porn Legend Ron Jeremy Dead at 59

  • mike9400

    live long Ron Jermy

  • mike9400

    that means you big papa get the fuck this post if you sooooo butt hurt

  • mike9400

    for you who think ron jermey is dead go crawl back up you moms vagina he is not dead he had an aneurysum in his heart due to his whight hight and b/p he is stil a live and even if he dies god forbid he will always be the most ledgendry porn star in the world and who ever said her is a fat porkbelly hair ball take the dick out of your ass your just mad because you have a small ass penis and ron dones not

  • big papa

    nigga please that ugly ass fucken hair ball with legs should do the world a huge favor and die short ugly hairy pot belly pig i pitty all women paid to fuck that alien…..

  • bitch please

    Fuck you he’s no dead!