Syrian Dictator Bashar Al-Assad assassinated

RIP Bashar Al Assad, dead from an assassin's bullet on March 24, 2013

RIP Bashar Al Assad, dead from an assassin’s bullet on March 24, 2013

DAMASCUS — Brutal Syrian Dictator and Opthamologist Bashar Al-Assad was assassinated by a disgruntled bodyguard Sunday Morning, as western propaganda alleged his involvement in recent chemical attacks rightfully attributed to so-called revolutionary forces which act as proxies for Christendom. Assad was rushed to hospital in critical condition, but did not survive the gunshot wounds.

Fans of Assad mourn his loss and hope the state of emergency instituted in 1963 will continue in perpetuity. Assad has followed through with promises to appease Arab Spring protesters by further violent suppression of political speech and increasing crackdowns on rebels influenced by western powers.

Kim Jong-Un poured a forty-ounce over the grave of his grandfather saying, “I ain’t gonna forget my nigga Assad, he been sendin’ me dat rocketry ‘n shit, and he always hooked a brother up with Hennessy.”

The assassin was reportedly arrested while screaming, in English, “We are Anonymous! Expect Us!”

20 comments to Syrian Dictator Bashar Al-Assad assassinated

  • NNCSATANN

    Go fuk or mom I don’t need a mask join the no name revolution anti anon we have kings with internet faces so go fuk urself and your shitty tricks kids.Before the dark one makes you his by ache evp that shit get out your scienetoligist honey bullshit anon brainwash inbu with his fathers money and the true Antichrist killed himself with pill the joker is running around on illuminate mind control pills and little Wayne is gonna punk Justin bieber so fun ya and juggalos are the better trend than fundametalidt bullshit they cram down your brain maan do revert nnc PS I hack oi fuker s

  • NNCSATANN

    Rejoice the catholic church must be taken back by the people and pollygraphs for all my new minion the pope should go to sleep and figure out some new shit for the dark ones arrival before the moon is blood red should have asked the homosexual popes and priests why they wanna destroy the richest church cause they scum dam you even Lucifer Hayes you

  • NNCSATANN

    I really think itz fukin amazing bro planz of the adolescent hellbringers June six 2006 brought in the arrival of your dark oppressors demise.Illuminati rejoiced and the kingdom of hell on earth was born ur anonaumous but we are NNC join the revolution

  • I don’t know why, but I believe this.

  • yuo should haev expected us!!1 u mad brah?