Molly Crabapple’s latest painting, OpPornPixie
INTERENT — Molly Crabapple, artist and blogger known for her commentary about how the world’s messed up, tweeted Friday about her latest painting entitled OpPornPixie. At the center of the operation is a highly stylized and glamorous self-portrait overlaid with a bloodspatter of the kind of abusive comments . . .
Babies that were once aborted are getting a second chance, thanks to breakthroughs in robotics and industrialized human cloning.
WISCONSIN — Scientist, Polymath, and newly recognized Saint of the Divinity Megachurch Consortium Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador proudly announced, “Thanks be to the grace of God and the miracles of modern science, that today . . .
The OsamaCoin is the world’s fastest growing cryptocurrency designed for financing terror operations.
INERNET — The New OsamaCoin cryptocurrency, a digital commodity much like bitcoin, has reached a total market value of $10 trillion overnight as investors in Dubai learned of its existence through a viral buzzfeed blog post entitled OsamaCoins, the . . .
Six years into Barack Obama’s term, ‘the drone strike madman’ recently executed a series high-profile civilian murders political analysts referred to as “the Columbine of the Middle East.” . . .
The CIA has immunized the globe from dangerous terrorist genes “for centuries to come”
INTERNET — The CIA’s secret terror vaccine program, used to preemptively punish foreigners with “terror markers” in their genome, ended today even as it successfully brought peace to areas of Pakistan, Afghanistan, and beyond.
By analyzing the genomes of . . .
An emergency escape helicopter approaches the White House Friday morning as militias assemble at the gates
INTERNET — President Obama and staff fled to a secret location Friday afternoon utilizing escape tunnels and helicopters as armed American Spring militia men surrounded the White House.
American Spring militias now Occupy the White House and . . .
A banker emerged from his balconies overlooking the bull in the financial district. Adorned in a royal purple gown with golden and chains of the finest gold, he flashed a knowing smile to the proletariat. In his teeth shown a stately “grill” of perfect gold caps. All his teeth are now gold, encased in the fruits of hard labor, and shrewd capitalism. . . .
INTERNET — Metamodernism is an ism. Ism’s are important, as they help us define our daily behaviors, creations and artistic expressions. Yep, they’re importante. Why though, you don’t ask? Well, I’ll tell you: we have a need to classify and quantify our emotions and creative endeavors into a ‘sandbox’. This ‘sandbox’ can be escaped, yet . . .
Fascist Ukrainian zealots storm Moscow
INTERNET — Ukrainian fascists and their newly conscripted military marched on Russia Friday, taking both Moscow and St. Petersburg in an overnight “blitzkrieg” mobile infantry offensive. Millions are dead after preliminary warning nukes were detonated in low population density areas in the United States, Europe, Central Asia, Australia, . . .
My time as a “real journalist”
I recently spent time as a news reporter covering Virginia state politics. Over the course of a series of anxiety attacks and a number of shattered worldviews, I learned that ideology is important to politics like OJ’s alibi helped his case. Sure, you can put out a . . .