Artist’s rendition of the artificial crescent moon over Dubai.
DUBAI — The Center for the Advancement of Islam, whose offices are located on the top floor of the world’s largest skyscraper, Burj Khalifa, announced plans on Tuesday for a hundred billion dollar project to place a permanent monument in orbit around the Lagrange point between the Earth and the Moon. A spokesman for the group said, “This monument, perhaps the greatest of all time, will bring the essence of the Prophet’s message to nine billion people each night.”
In cooperation with the industrialized Russian space program, the Center for the Advancement of Islam hopes to launch several hundred heavy lift rockets loaded with thin reflective material which will be assembled in orbit to form the giant star and crescent of Islam. According to rocket scientist Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador, “Nothing like this has ever been done before, but it is feasible. With a hundred billion dollars it should be easy to develop the technology required to assemble such massive reflectors in space and complete the project. Because the plan is to orbit a Lagrange point, this monument will be effectively permanent.”
The star and crescent was first popularly used by the Ottoman empire during the crusades. Some scholars prefer to draw its lineage to worship of Hecate by the Byzantines, while others believe it was derived from early Turkic tribes. Osman I, founder of the Ottoman Empire, is said to have seen the symbol rising into the heavens from the chest of a Qadi, or judge of Sharia law, as part of a mystic vision in which Islam “cover[ed] the whole world with the shadow of its green and beautiful branches.”
KENOSHA, Wisconsin — It has come to my attention from a dear twitter follower and fellow presidential hatemail author, @HerObama, that local police are not only utilizing visible light communications to transmit rays that not only sedate it’s victims, but collects data on their license plates. I had my skepticism, obviously, being a level-headed veteran journalist I need to fact check and verify any and every theory that comes through the offices here at The Internet Chronicle. We often get a lot of faxes, tweets and voicemails with regards to “conspiracy theories,” so we try to verify them as much as possible before going public with our data.
What I found was absolutely terrifying. Worse than the Rustle League and Ron Brynaert terrorizing top-tier lawyer Sue Brasko. The photo sent to me by @HerObama clearly shows an unmarked police vehicle with a device attached to it that absolutely 100% collects license plate data and ships it off to the nearest fusion center to be processed, analyzed and sent to the NSA’s datacenter in Utah for safe keeping and High Value Target(HVT) evaluation.
Irrefutable photographic proof of license plate data collection by local police officers.
Mr. @HerObama has been a long time supporter of the Internet Chronicle, whose twitter account is also owned by Lebal Drocer, Inc., so it’s been a great honor to finally be working with him to uncover these heinous crimes perpetrated by a government that cares not for the safety and privacy of their people, rather in the creation of a pacified society of hungry ghosts.
WASHINGTON – Tim Alberta reports for National Journal that the “Republican Study Committee [RSC]—a group of 172 conservative House members—has barred Heritage Foundation employees from attending its weekly meeting in the Capitol.” Heritage, a fiscally conservative Washington think-tank, has traditionally been involved in the closed-door meetings but no longer.
Through the summer, Heritage insisted that a relatively popular program, commonly known as “food stamps,” be voted on separately from subsidies to big agrobusiness.
In July, Michael Needham, CEO of Heritage arm Heritage Action, released a statement to that effect. It read, “The purpose of ending the unholy alliance that has dominated the food stamp and farm bill for decades is to allow substantive debate that would allow the House to show its conservative values. Also, Needham warned the RSC against “subsidies and government intervention that will continue to harm consumers and taxpayers alike.”
You can read more here about how powerful Republican Party politicians are in league against conservatives and with powerful farming special interests.
MOSCOW, Russia – In an unexpected turn of events on Wednesday, NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden outed a supposedly rag-tag group of Syrian rebel hackers as a sophisticated persona management project. Little has been known about the Syrian Electronic Army (SEA) since inception, but most believe them to be residing in Damascus, Syria. Aside from a few shoddily written VICE interviews and an excellent write-up from Brian Krebs, there hasn’t been much information about the inner-workings of the crew.
Today, Internet Chronicle correspondents had a chance to catch up with Snowden for a few rounds of Moscow Mules while we discussed how the Syrian Electronic Army may be, in fact, more illusory than we could have possibly imagined.
The Internet Chronicle: Did you know about the Syrian Electronic Avenue before they became mainstream?
Edward Snowden: I did. The intel passed through my data center numerous times, months before they even began to make waves with their arbitrarily chosen attacks that were, of course, dignified ex post facto.
IC: Fascinating. Do you know if they are truly Syrian freedom fighters or something else entirely?
ES: OK, from what I saw, it’s hard to tell either way. As the United States’ hands are dipped in all sorts of fucking gunk, there’s no telling what’s really going on. However, I got to see plenty of internal memorandums referencing SEA as a group of roughly six people. The company Infragard was mentioned quite a bit in the slides that I saw.
IC: Infragard? You mean the private government cybersecurity contracting firm?
ES: Correct. They came up quite a bit in our paperwork, as they tend to work closely with pretty much every government agency involved in covert operations. As do Lockheed Martin, Halliburton, and of course Booz Allen Hamilton.
IC: So what you’re saying is SEA is a creation of a private security firm contracted out by the U.S. government?
Snowden is widely regarded as a hero.
ES: From the information that I saw, that didn’t seem important at the time, but in retrospect, yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying. It’s plain to see that if you analyze the language they use, you can tell they have been trained to type in broken English, which is a common tactic deployed by the CIA, later adopted into persona management projects spearheaded by HBGary Federal in their Romas/COIN program that was uncovered by the now incarcerated journalist, the Hunter S. Thompson of our era, Barrett Brown. It really makes you think.
People don’t realize that these private contractors are truly the enemies. They’ve even forced Obama’s hand into nuking Syria and killing 5 million people, all because of the cyberwarfare via anti-rhetoric perpetuated by the SEA. Obama’s just the puppet for the masterminds at the Infragard splinter-cell persona management project. We’ve been trained to see this group as simple hacktivist merry-pranksters fighting a war against Twitter accounts and whois information. Yet, they are something far more insidious.
IC: The popular theme being thrown around these days is “the next war will be fought online.” Could this be the beginning?
ES: Absolutely. In fact, I would go so far as saying it has been going on for far longer than we even realize. Nation-state actors have been deployed via persona management firms for years now, ever since Tom Ryan Blog, aka th3j35t3r, tricked people into believing he was a porn star and got a heaps of classified information from unsuspecting troglodytes on Facebook. These types of spurious entities are really only the beginning. Imagine villages, even entire cities completely fabricated by military contractors! Think about the hacking power they would have and the ability to steer public interest. Scary shit, man.
Nation Editor Barbara Ehrenreich said the Government’s Message to the Poor is ‘Die’
WASHINGTON – Barbara Ehrenreich, contributing editor at The Nation, suggested on August 15 that the government’s message to poor people is essentially to “die.” Asked by The Internet Chronicle about the roots of New York City’s stop-and-frisk program, Ehrenreich alluded to a Michigan woman’s struggle to escape a 30-day prison sentence for being unable to pay for a son’s incarceration. Ehrenreich was speaking at the Lamont Street Collective.
“There’s a punitive mentality in this country,” said Ehrenreich, “that is not entirely sane.”
New York City Police have a long-standing policy of halting, interrogating, and searching pedestrians – judicial critics have said, without probable cause. In an August 12 decision, federal District Judge Shira Scheindlin rejected the city’s stop-and-frisk policy, saying that it amounted to “indirect racial profiling.” The vast majority of those stopped in 2012 alone were black or Hispanic.
New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg has defended the policy. And Tuesday, city attorneys sent a letter to Scheindlin citing statistics that use of the policy had declined by more than half over a year.
According to a statement by the American Civil Liberties Union, Edwina Nowlin, a Detroit, Michigan native, served 28 days of her sentence before the organization’s having successfully interceded.
Ehrenreich, the New York Times bestselling author of “Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America” blamed the rise of New York City’s financial sector in the 1980s and 1990s for the persecution of the poor. “Gentrification,” she said, has become rationale for targeting the impoverished.
Said Ehrenreich, Nowlin “was picked up by the cops on the street and charged with not only the usual homeless crime of being in the street and so forth but with failing to pay for her son’s – 16-year-old son’s – room and board in jail … So [Nowlin] gets picked up and she gets put in jail for that. Then she gets a paycheck. She thinks it can be applied to her son’s room and board, but no, it’s immediately confiscated for her room and board in jail.”
Added Ehrenreich, “Now, what is going on here? What are they thinking? I mean, the message to people who don’t have money is, ‘die;’ you know, just be dead; be gone.”
Ehrenreich also said that the mass incarceration of the poor – the design, she claims, of the Bloomberg administration’s embrace of stop-and-frisk – initiated under the aegis of beautification.
At the close of her talk, she said that her opposition to stop-and-frisk not due to its enforcement being racist but because police should not have grounds to randomly halt and interrogate innocent individuals whatsoever.
The author’s comments on August 15 are in the video below:
Scientists are scrambling to come up with a way to neutralize Fukushima Radiation.
FUKUSHIMA — A new study by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration shows that temperatures in the Pacific are heating up at an enormous rate, due to another massive leak of radiation at Fukushima. Worldwide, citizens are reporting excessive humidity and rain which is a direct result of the rapid increase in the Pacific Ocean’s increasing temperature.
Nuclear Climatologist Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador said, “Even if no more radiation were to leak, we could conservatively estimate another 80 years of increased Pacific Ocean surface temperatures. Global humidity will not decrease until the fallout loses most of its potency in 40 years. There are no imaginable countermeasures to waterborne oceanic fallout that will not increase the already considerable strain on ocean life.”
Weeks ago, the Ocean began boiling around Fukushima. There is now too much steam to photograph the area.
Psychoanalyst Dr. Herman Stephenson said, “The Japanese have a symbolic fixation on both nuclear disasters and the ocean. It is unthinkable that any single sensible person would locate a nuclear power plant right on the oceanfront in a place where Tsunamis are so common. Perhaps the loss of World War 2 and the subsequent 70 years of a novel government guided by Western values has inspired an unconscious suicidal urge. Perhaps it was even a long-delayed conscious act of Seppuku.”
Snowden told reporters he had proof Martin Luther King was assassinated in a secret CIA plot.
MOSCOW — Edward Snowden, NSA leaker, shared secret CIA documents with Internet Chronicle reporters which incontrovertibly prove that Martin Luther King was murdered because, as the internal memo says, “Initial analysis showed blacks just wanted to use public restrooms and participate in pointless ‘voting’ rituals, but that n***er King has crossed the Rubicon and wants actual change. He wants to organize labor. Take him out at any cost.” This secret CIA memo was dated just a few days before King was assassinated.
Snowden chose Martin Luther King Day to release these shocking documents for its symbolic importance to Americans. This holiday is a time to remember King’s famous “dream,” which has turned into a nightmare in many urban areas where schools are still segregated and the only form of social mobility left is drug dealing.
Snowden said he believed King’s dream has been systematically stamped out by the CIA, “A rogue group within the CIA acted with impunity to target blacks. They murdered JFK, MLK, and hired the scientists who invented crack. Then, they sent agents into black urban centers to teach drug dealers how to cook crack, ensuring that the socioeconomic imbalance would continue to favor whites for as long as possible. Is it a coincidence that since then, the war on drugs has imprisoned millions of blacks? Based on a few hints, I believe this cabal within the CIA actually held more allegiance to the Ku Klux Klan than the US government, and what’s more, it seems they’re still operating to this day to keep ‘drug war’ propaganda in the public eye. It’s time to let Martin Luther King’s people go. They’ve been in prison for long enough.”
We all knew it already. The government’s the devil.
INTERNET — Every single fucking day, Twitter revolutionaries speak of dismantling the government. Why? Because our friends at the NSA have terrible surveillance powers no one should ever have access to, and the military conveniently polices genocidal dictators. Terrible, chilling stuff. But if you take down the government, you take down a monolithic totem of evil.
Tomorrow, Anarchist hackers will shut down all major government networks and permanently wipe all the government hard drives. Because the government will be so off guard, other Anarchists will be inspired by the propaganda of such an epic deed, and all levels of government even down to police stations and schools will be dissolved or brought under control of the Anarchists. A lot of people will probably die in this process, but not so many as one might think, because Anarchists are nice and don’t really want to hurt anyone.
The next day, many billionaires, sensing a vacuum of power, will offer to pay members of the disenfranchised military and police forces a reduced wage. Better than nothing, and no one will have to starve or find a nonexistent job market for their skills. Order will be enforced more ruthlessly than ever and corporations will have absolutely no reason to protect any individual rights, as such things do not generally help make a profit. The days of old, when police officers could be prosecuted for hate crimes, will be long over. Now the NSA won’t spy on you, but Google and every other major Telecom has been playing that game for as long as they’ve been in business, and there won’t be much need for pesky privacy agreements because there will be no courts for you to sue them with. All prisons will be corporate prisons filled simply with people who chose Coke instead of Pepsi or pirated movies online.
“Right now there is a conspiracy among many of the world’s most powerful corporations to destroy all nation states so that business can make more profit.” ~ Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador
These things will all be very good for business, but actually this is where we are now. Government is suffocating under corporate power. The greatest hoodwink they’ve played is telling us the government is to blame for their evil. “We’ve got too much government, and if we only had a little less, or none at all, everything would be solved.” Yes, it is the corporations telling you that government stands between you and your freedoms, because that message makes them money. They can’t scream it loud or repeatedly enough, because they’ve just now discovered how damned effective it is at increasing their profits. When you buy this idea and slap an Anarchy label on it, or go to a Tea Party event because you saw it on Their television networks, you’re led to believe you’re opposing evil, and all you’re doing is helping some corporate bigwig afford enormous excesses of equity that can’t be spent on anything but property in Iraq, Afghanistan, or Syria! Pretty damned good trick, huh?
You’re probably too damned radical to want to participate in the boring work of political organizing, or maybe you’re so damn radical you did, so you joined the Tea Party. All Hail the New TransNational Corporate Overlord. You!
Domestic Extremists: Al Jazeera America’s Coverage is Covering up the Truth about Syria
WASHINGTON – As a full-scale NATO offensive against Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad looms, the Obama administration’s Commerce Department is ensuring that Americans have full access to accurate information about the upcoming struggle. Commerce Secretary Penny Pritzker said Tuesday that any Americans attempting to Web-stream Al Jazeera English, as opposed to Al Jazeera America, would face felony charges.
In an on-the-record teleconference Tuesday Sec. Penny Pritzker said, “Al Jazeera America is the go-to source for Americans interested in news about the conflict. In a time of war, it’s time for Americans to unify around one story and one nation.”
State Public Affairs Undersecretary Tara Sonenshine joined Sec. Pritzker on the call, and added what she described as “much-needed” context to State Secretary Hillary Clinton’s Spring 2011 advisement that Al Jazeera English had proven the “real news.”
It was then, in the midst of the Arab spring, that Sec. Clinton said, “Al Jazeera has been the leader in … literally changing people’s minds and attitudes” and that it had been “really effective.”
Ms. Sonenshine addressed complaints by disloyal Al Jazeera staff, published in Lebanon’s Al Akhbar, that Al Jazeera had become oblivious to suffering allegedly caused at the hands of the Free Syrian Army’s freedom fighters.
Screenshot: Al Jazeera English, Inappropriate for Americans
Ms Sec. Sonenshine said, “Unfortunately, frivolous public statements by violators of NDAs [nondisclosure agreements] have compromised what remains an interest in global awareness and the free flow of information.”
The high-level officials’ comments echo a Commerce Department position articulated last month. A department Green Paper made clear the administration’s position that Congress should “enact legislation adopting the same range of penalties for criminal streaming of copyrighted works as now exists for criminal reproduction and distribution.” As the liberation of Syria has become more certain, Congress has acted to ensure that violators of intellectual property rights are delivered justice.
“Would-be offenders,” said Ms. Sonenshine, “should understand our commitment to protecting the innovation of all of our global partners, including Al Jazeera America. I want the international community to understand we take our IP [intellectual property] obligations as seriously as ever.”
Al Jazeera provided what the state secretary regarded as “cutting-edge” coverage of the Arab Spring. Since then, the Qatar-based news service has launched a new channel, Al Jazeera America, tailored especially to the interests and – said Undersecretary Sonenshine – self-interests of middle-class Americans.
Sec. Pritzer cited her concern that citizens might become “confused” about the United States’ and al-Qaeda’s new, mutual front against the barbarism of the Assad regime. Al-Qaeda, a Salafist and Wahhabist group slandered throughout the Gulf, is now on the front lines against the Syrian evildoers.
“While Americans have every right to feel misgivings over al-Qaeda’s role in perpetrating the 9/11 attacks,” said Sec. Pritzker, “it is far more important, for national security, for them to now remember the plight of Syrians suffering from the Assad regime’s morally obscene deployment of weapons of mass destruction.” Added Pritzer, “The agenda of freedom in the Middle East is larger than any given sect or clique. We can’t kowtow to domestic extremists bent on enforcing their grudges on the rest of civil society.”
A large area of Damascus was transformed into a “Sea of Glass” after Obama ordered retaliation for chemical attacks on Syrian civilians.
DAMASCUS — Much of Syria has been transformed into a “Sea of Glass” after sources reported an enormous nuclear blast Wednesday. President Obama addressed the American people from the Oval Office, saying, “We cannot permit the use of weapons of mass destruction against innocent civilians anywhere in the world. The Assad regime has been annihilated and can no longer threaten the peace and stability of the world.”
Early estimates suggest as many as 5 million Syrians died instantly, and nuclear fallout specialists suggest that nearly a million will die slow, painful deaths from cancer and mutations. People around the globe have taken to the streets in mourning for the civilians killed by the Assad regime’s vile chemical attacks.
Russian President Vladimir Putin issued a furious statement to President Obama, “Next time we’re looking for a new source of oil and have to drop a nuke, the world should know who to blame. Obama has set the precedent, and now we’re just looking for our first target. The Russian people are as thirsty for oil as the Americans, and we have even more powerful nukes!”