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World новости

HEY GUESS WHAT? MORE WAR!

Here’s the shit CNN won’t report

It’s not Kim Kardashian. It’s not Casey Anthony’s dead little baby. It’s not even Weiner’s dick. Nope. It’s another fucking WAR!

In April, the lying United States President Barack Obama said there are “no boots on the ground” in Libya but we reported there certainly are “shoes on the ground.” And boots. America continues its oil campaign through the desert as Obama prepares to declare war on Libya, who is currently already at war with itself.

Obama wants in on dat

Obama submitted a 34-page document to House Speaker John Boehner in support of all-out war on Libya. Lawsuits are being prepared against the administration which is currently engaged in illegal acts of war inside the oil-controlled nation of Libya, and Obama was required to justify his weird acts of war.

Many Americans will not even ask the question “Why not Syria?” where cold-blooded slayings of innocent, unarmed protesters take place as you read this – because Americans smart enough to ask that question are smart enough to know America’s role is not to spread Democracy, but to keep its own oil prices low.

The rest of the American public allow warmongering to continue because 98% of them are kept ignorant by corporate media and their own lazy, noninquisitive lifestyles; they probably just assume it’s all good in the ‘hood as long as their reality TV shows don’t exhibit signs of political polarization.

The U.S. State Department is considering lifting its ban on women in combat roles. This is likely less in the interest of women’s rights, and more because they don’t have enough meat in the field to sustain four simultaneous wars. Libya can expect a flood of women’s rights, where women will soon be found legally behind the gun pointed at your terrorist sand-babies.

Germany couldn’t warmonger on half the fronts we do but we’ll pull it off, because America’s number 1.

Chronicle.SU reporter Old Brutus called the CNN tipline to let them know Obama submitted to Congress what he said is a “legal basis for war” on Libya. Brutus assumed they had not yet learned of the development since they were broadcasting stories about Angelina Jolie and people having a hard time playing golf.

Old Brutus called the New York City CNN tip-line to make them aware of the news but could only speak to a machine. He left the following message:

[audio:https://chronicle.su/wp-content/uploads/message-from-old-brutus-to-cnn1.mp3|titles=Old Brutus’ message to CNN]

Then, dissatisfied and wishing to speak with a human being, Old Brutus called the Atlanta, Ga. headquarters where computers have not yet assumed oppressive control over the flow of information. In Ga. it recently became legal for women to work, so a girl answered the phone.

She said she was not aware of the President’s justification for war on Libya to Congress, and forwarded him to the same tip-line he called to reach her. While holding, Brutus quickly plugged his voice recorder back into his hyper-encrypted landline handset and recorded the following conversation:

[audio:https://chronicle.su/wp-content/uploads/tip-line1.mp3|titles=Old Brutus submits a news tip to CNN]

Elf Wax Media Ethics Analyst Billiam Falshe, who is glued constantly to CNN and supports their every move, was available for comment. Shortly before increasing the volume on his television, Falshe had this to say:

We like pretty dead babys with pretty mothers. We don’t like ugly sand-niggers blown to pieces by our political hate machine.

In the news today:

  • Someone injured during an angelina jolie visit to bumfuck nowhere
  • John Boehner plays golf “under pressure” [editor’s note: Boehner is scheduled to play golf with the President, who Boehner asked to submit a proposal for his thus-far-illegal war on Libya. *Gasp!* I wonder what they will they talk about?]
  • A new battlefront! [oh, between republicans and democrats]
  • For at least 30 minutes, Casey Anthony’s trial dominated BOTH CNN channels
  • Sarah Palin, for some reason
Categories
Editorial Politics

The United States Government Is Completely Irrelevant

The American Revolution is Inevitable

Historically, America has been a model for Democracy and the Western way of life. But we’ve lost our national identity to enablers who gave corporations carte blanche at the Bank of American Dreams. That’s okay. It happens. That’s the end result of Capitalism. They got all our money. They’re not going to give it back. That is a fact we have to accept which can’t be changed.

Further deterioration of our standard of living can be prevented, however, but it’s going to take “something bigger” than simply electing a new guy in 2012.

To avoid total collapse of the American nation, Americans need to overthrow their government, which is now extensively corrupt, harmful and irrelevant.

Capitalism is fine, but the United States Government is not. It must come down.

The American Dream should not belong only to the elite, but high-ranking government officials created the conditions allowing corporate entities to absorb so much money, there is not enough left to run a business, much less turn a profit. Starting a small business is virtually impossible. Even as the Federal Reserve prints more money it can’t substantiate, that new cash finds its way not into the federal budget, not into your paychecks, not in the form of an economic stimulus package, but into the vacuum of corporate will, forcing inflation.

America is in the exact same place as Egypt before Egypt’s revolution and will ultimately be forced to follow their model, military-based interim government and all.

The media is not going to do it for you. There will be no reality TV show called “Protesters,” where the stars conspire to revolt all the while taking your emotional housewives on a spiritual journey into their own ugly centers. The TV news won’t even acknowledge a revolution until it’s right outside their doors, and God only knows the spin they’re going to put on it for you middle-aged couch-dwellers out there.

So you are on your own with your decision to stay put or to act. But you can rest assured, that regardless of your choice, you will not be alone; and should you choose to act on the purest of impulses – to see justice brought to our corrupt leaders – you will be joined not by tens of thousands, but a half-million or more good, Democracy-loving Americans just like yourselves.

Using the Egyptian model, change is within reach. The American military is comprised of our brothers, sisters, children, friends and parents who wish to see the best for America, not corrupt politicians; and like Egypt, will continue to protect the country, even if a murderous career liar happens to hold office.

The only reason Egypt hasn’t yet fully come around is because they’re still trying to draft a Constitution. Americans love their Constitution, inasmuch as the Federal Government allows us to use it.

Therefore, every 10,000 protesters on the streets will be matched by 100,000 who, from their PCs and recliners, may wish the revolutionaries well, and pray silently to God activism doesn’t shut down the Internet.

If American leadership refuses to use the tools voted into their hands, then there is no other solution than to empty every seat in the House, Congress and Senate, and clear out the White House – and also their bank accounts – where at least a portion of your money sits, awaiting reclamation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness- That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed – That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of those ends, it is Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.

-Declaration of Independence (more abused than my semi-colons)

Categories
News Politics World

Iran bastardizes "Democratic" election


Chaos in Iran
—————-

Mir Hossein Mousavi, Ahmadinejad’s opposition in Iran’s primary election, has been placed on house arrest following mass rioting throughout the broken nation.

Rigged polls gave the incumbent dictator 63 percent of the votes, leaving Mousavi with less than 34 percent – a difference that, if not tragic, is laughably contrary to what inside analysts projected. Most analysts, including secret inside reporters risking their lives and freedom to report the truth, indicated early on that given the outrageously high young voter turnout, Mousavi would probably walk away with “at least half” of the votes.

Mousavi was even beaten in his own “heartland” – a tampering that secures all suspicions that something is inherently wrong with modern voting standards in every Democratic region, but especially in those regions with Religious entanglement and high-profile corruption.

One Iranian citizen expressed his disenchantment with the ongoing bastardization of his Republic, saying, “You just have to close your eyes and try not to think about it.”