A study conducted by the trustworthy United States Government reveals all drugs fuck you up equally, severely and permanently. …MOAR!
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By  Frank Mason, on September 15th, 2009% 2 comments  Health  ad, ad council, bill hicks, commercial, DEA, drugs, freedom, important, Marijuana, president, PSA, Science, Weed By Frank Mason, on September 11th, 2009%The Elf Wax Times doesn’t hate lesbians, but statistics show that as the number of lesbians increase, the number of girls willing to fuck Elf Wax staff writers declines, threatening America’s freedom. …MOAR! 5 comments Editorial billy mays, bo diddly, bush, change, cheney, concision, congress, craigslist, drunk, elf wax times, freedom, freepress, gays, government, hillary clinton, homosexuals, hope, hypocrites, internet, jane fonda, journalism, lesbians, lies, logic, mccain, media, media mogul, meet the press, military, News, noam chomsky, obama, objectivity, politicians, rage against the machine, reason, rolling stones, rush limbaugh, terrorism, the doors, truth, TV, Uncontrollable Patriotism, weenus, writer By Frank Mason, on June 14th, 2009%“When Miley Cyrus broke the sound barrier, we thought we’d seen everything. However, after punching through the Earth’s exosphere, the Disney Star approached escape velocity at 7 miles per second, then exploded brilliantly into a stream of atoms.“ -Eyewitness report Miley Cyrus, moments before reaching critical mass …MOAR! By Frank Mason, on March 7th, 2009%Our right to privacy extends only as far as our ability to protect it since technological advancement and the government have joined hands against us. The right to privacy will be as void for humanity as the right to a fair trial was to the Guantanamo Bay detainees. …MOAR! By Ronny Nitro, on April 9th, 2008%
PALO ALTO, CA–Amidst recent protests disrupting the Olympic Torch Relay throughout several countries, a recent study conducted by the Logical Institute of Thought, or LIT, in Palo Alto has concluded that in no point in the modern Olympic Games’ 112-year history has the worldly tradition of relaying the ignited Olympic torch ever interfered or influenced …MOAR! |
 
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