New study links marijuana to hunger, passivity

We were going to write an excerpt for this story but then Rasta-man totally forgot what it was about so we grilled cheese sandwiches and let the intern worry about it. …MOAR!

The Third World War on the Third World

NEW! MCMAFIA FROM MCDONALD’S, sold only in Italy. Read to find out what Sarah Palin’s hand has to say. Spoiler Alert: it’s not a handjob or else she wouldn’t have retarded children. …MOAR!

Eleven dead after release of new McDonald’s “food product”

Micky D’s Darkest Day: McDonald’s claims thousands of lives every year using diabetes, malnutrition and obesity, but today was different. …MOAR!