New Game Call of Duty: Modern Occupation 2 Makes Imperialism Fun Again

An Afghani clears away rubble, but not fast enough.

Experience the awesome realism of day-to-day military operations from the eyes of a grizzled xenophobic Alabaman named Jeff Cleburn, and count the days until he rotates out of this shithole. . . .

UBL Died for the Sins of Lebal Drocer

SCAPEGOAT!

This is just a friendly reminder that if United States President Barack Hussein Obama happens to be reelected, this is why.

Osama bin Laden died as a martyr, but not his way. Bin Laden died at the hands of Seal Team Six in the name of . . .

President Obama Trolls The Press: Opens Speech With Minute Of Unexplained Silence

The President just . . . stood there, staring out vacantly at everybody. We didn’t know what he was doing. He said it was a moment of silence. But for what? . . .

#fuckyouwashington

I love my fucking country. And my country loves fucking me. . . .

White House Demands Assange Assassination

Julian Assange

The hounds are loose. It might not be okay to call for certain people’s demise, but Assange is still fair game! . . .

America Finally Closes Its Borders

America finally closes its Borders

Jumpin’ borders. . . .

Final Shuttle Launch Signifies Total Apathy Toward Human Progress

final-launch

This article can be safely ignored, because it is about the space shuttle which is now irrelevant. Not like that makes a difference to you, though, because you never cared in the first place. . . .

HEY GUESS WHAT? MORE WAR!

libyan war map

Murder-Mom Casey Anthony goes to war against large-tittied Kim Kardashian, who said the gorgeous and camera-friendly Casey Anthony killed her own photogenic baby. We got your attention yet? Obama wants to go to war with Libya. . . .

New Obama Documents Reveal Lapse in Judgment, Fraudulent School Funds

Either Barack Obama’s birth certificate is not valid, or he fraudulently received foreign-exchange scholarships. . . .

Barack Obama’s personality cult

Democrats will regurgitate every word of Barack Obama’s as if it were their own. His personality cult has grown through war and propaganda to rival Stalin. . . .