New Century American Motto

miss atom 2009

Witness the flower unfold, wither and die, and become the dirt again. And then watch the dirt fry. …MOAR!

Blow the man down

Heterosexual representative of New York Eric Massa has admitted to being homosexual by not admitting to anything. Everybody’s a little bit gay. …MOAR!

Local man repairs relationship, loses penis

Roanoke, Va.–A Roanoke man savagely mutilated himself Friday while trying to prove to his ex-wife he was “still man enough to sexual role-play and use a skill saw naked.” Sources say he was attempting to sacrifice the family housecat to the love gods when things suddenly appeared very …MOAR!